


It's All In The Timing

by sincelight



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Angst with a Happy Ending, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Humor, Light Angst, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-25
Updated: 2018-02-25
Packaged: 2019-03-23 15:33:25
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 30,457
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13790709
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sincelight/pseuds/sincelight
Summary: Baekhyun is just your average emotionally scarred college kid making up for his fear of commitment by sleeping around. Chanyeol is an arcade game pro who teaches Baekhyun more than just how to hit a jackpot.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This could almost be a coffee shop au but Baek spends a lot of time in the arcade he works at, and doing other stupid college kid stuff with his friends. I really really love this fic and hope it gets a lot of love! Baek and Yeol's rivalry ends pretty quickly and their relationship progresses just as fast, mostly because that's not the main issue in the story as you'll see once you get past the first chapter.

Winner! Winner! Winner!

The machine across from the prize counter rings loud throughout the arcade; kids from all over turn their heads, jealous of the tall guy who keeps winning the big jackpots. They all watch as the machine spits out an endless stream of tickets that pile up at the guy’s feet as he high-fives his friend playing at the machine directly beside him.

Baekhyun is watching too, with one elbow resting on the glass counter and his chin pressed flat against his palm; he’s chewing his nails again even though he said he was going to stop. He knows this guy. Well, he doesn’t _know_ know him, but he’s seen him around the arcade enough to recognize him. He’s the only customer he’d call a regular, seeing as he’s there just as much as Baekhyun is. The only difference is that Baekhyun actually works at the arcade, this tall, freakishly good at arcade games guy is just obsessed with hitting jackpots and crushing little kid’s dreams, apparently.

“He’s really good,” Jongin says from beside Baekhyun, still watching the tall guy, but now squinting in annoyance because he’s dancing around like an idiot. “Are you glaring because you’re jealous?”

Baekhyun purses his lips and turns his attention to his coworker. “Shut up, I would never be jealous of,” he turns to look at the tall guy, now happily shaking his ass, “that,” he finishes as he turns back to Jongin. “He’s literally an idiot.” He watches the guy dance for another few seconds then returns to his relaxed position on the counter, letting out a long sigh. “He is really fucking lucky though.”

“He won a jackpot for 8,000 tickets earlier,” Jongin says offhandedly as he straightens the shelf of cheap teddy bears. “And another for like 4,000. I had to go and put more tickets in the machine for him.”

Baekhyun huffs, “I feel like we’re always filling up the ticket slot for him. He really needs a new hobby.”

“Stick to what you know,” Jongin says, patting Baekhyun on the shoulder, “stick to what you’re good at.”

Baekhyun is left alone after that. It’s a boring job, most of the time spent standing around waiting for little kids coming to get a handful of candy with the couple hundred tickets they’ve won. It’s boring, but he gets free food and drinks, and he’s allowed fifty free play tokens a week which he’s been using to save up enough tickets to take home something cool, eventually.

His day drags on. It’s a fairly slow day in the arcade, like every Monday night, but this particular night is especially awful. He’s already had to clean vomit up in the bathroom and squeegee the glass of a pinball machine a kid chose to sneeze on, instead of turning his head like any normal person. He sighs, rearranges his numb ass cheeks on the stool he’s sitting on and is momentarily distracted by a child screaming from somewhere in the distance. He just wants to scroll through his Facebook feed until it’s time to close up.

“Hey,” a voice calls, and Baekhyun looks up. “Chanyeol, my friend over there,” the guy says as he points a thumb over his shoulder, “he told me to let you know that the machine ran out of tickets again.”

Baekhyun stands and looks over, unsurprised when he sees it’s tall guy standing beside a machine with an error code blinking across the screen. So, his name is Chanyeol, Baekhyun thinks. “Yeah, give me a sec. I’ll go grab a stream of tickets and be right over.”

He arrives at the machine where Chanyeol and his friend are lost in conversation. He drops the stack of tickets on the floor and gets down on his knees, using his key to open the ticket slot door so he can resupply the tickets.

A sudden voice close to him takes him by surprise; it’s deep and near enough to his ear that it sends a shiver down his spine. “Thanks for doing this,” Chanyeol says with a wide smile, “You guys must be sick of me by now.” Chanyeol laughs and straightens himself so that he’s looking down at Baekhyun instead of invading his personal space.

“Only a little,” Baekhyun jokes, though inside he knows he really means it. “You’re kinda infamous around here, among the workers anyway.” He smiles, Chanyeol is aggravatingly attractive this close up, and Baekhyun wishes he could slap himself for even having that thought. “Me and Jongin…my devastatingly handsome coworker,” he says offhandedly, “we like to call you the soul crusher.”

Chanyeol and his friend give each other a curious look and Baekhyun has to stop himself from laughing.

“We can always see the light leave the younger kid’s eyes every time you hit a jackpot. It’s like you have a sixth sense for when a machine is ready to payout; you crush the kid’s hopes and dreams.” He realizes he’s doing his idiotic rambling thing again and laughs just to shut himself up. “But yeah. Tickets are good to go now.”

“Cool. Thanks,” Chanyeol says, and his attention goes back to the game as tickets start spitting out of the machine once again.

Luckily for Baekhyun there are no more empty ticket slots, no one else decided to snot all over a machine; the rest of his shift was easy sailing. Fifteen minutes before closing, Chanyeol and his friend are the only people left. Baekhyun knows Chanyeol never turns in his tickets; he always takes them home in a big crumpled ball he carries proudly in his arms. He’s wondered a few times what Chanyeol is saving up to get. He’s a twenty-something dude, so he assumes it’s the PlayStation 4 sitting on a pretty pedestal at the very top of the prize wall. A whopping “125,000 Tickets” sticker slapped right across the box. Baekhyun looks up at it and chuckles, it would be cheaper to just walk into a store and buy one instead of buying hundreds of dollars worth of tokens every week.  

 

 

“His name’s Chanyeol,” Baekhyun says the next day. He’s sitting beside Jongin, as usual, behind the prize counter. There’s a relatively loud birthday party going on, so he has to raise his voice a bit.

“Who?” Jongin asks.

“Tall guy. His little, big-eyed friend came up to the counter after you left last night asking me to refill a machine for him, and told me Chanyeol’s name.”

“Ah,” Jongin says, half-wincing at a child who’d just fallen flat on his face trying to run to a machine. “So, are you totally gonna fuck him then?” He turns to look at Baekhyun now, taking in his confused and slightly offended face. “What? You sleep with everyone, nothing wrong with that.” He receives a hard punch to the shoulder and Baekhyun scoffs.

“This is why I hate you. This is why I told the manager to put your ass on days.” He pouts quietly to himself for a second, then adds, “Dick.”

As if on cue, Chanyeol and his same friend from the night before come strolling in the door, the latter talking animatedly about something Baekhyun can’t hear over the screaming children. He watches Chanyeol slip money into a token dispenser and fill a plastic cup to the brim; his friend does the same, and then they’re off to win tickets.

Most of Baekhyun’s shift is spent running after kids kicking and punching at machines, cleaning up after kids that can’t keep a cup secured in their hands, and shelling out handfuls of candy to kids redeeming their tickets. He doesn’t get much of a chance to watch Chanyeol play, like he usually does when he’s here, and he just wants to go home and face plant into his pillow…after he finishes his homework, of course.

Around 9:30, a half hour before closing, Jongin finally shows his face. He’d spent his shift working in the kitchen baking pizzas and dropping fries in the deep fryer. He looks like hell and his shirt is stained with grease, and Baekhyun can’t hold in his laugh.

“Why does Junmyeon always toss me in the kitchen for parties?” He flops into a chair and goes limp, sliding down until his ass is hanging off the seat, and he lets out a huge sigh. “I hate children and I hate this job.” Baekhyun laughs once again. “And I hate you too.”

Baekhyun has time to roll his eyes before he perks up, smiling at the sight of Chanyeol struggling to walk toward the counter with a large bunch of tickets hugged in his arms. He gets halfway to the counter, drops half of the tickets, gets tangled in them as he tries picking them up, and _finally_ makes it to the counter. “Hi,” he says, breathless as he grins at Baekhyun, peeking over at Jongin momentarily. “He okay?”

“Oh, Jongin?” Baekhyun side eyes his coworker and smirks, “Yeah, he just hates children.”

“Me too,” comes the deep voice from the night before. Chanyeol’s friend steps out from behind him, holding his own large, but slightly smaller than Chanyeol’s, bunch of tickets. He’s smiling at Jongin who now has his uniform hat over his face, assumedly trying to sleep. “They’re the worst,” he adds once he’s looking back to Baekhyun.

“So,” Baekhyun says to break the silence. He leans on the counter, popping his booty out and swaying his hips. “Finally cashing in on your tickets?”

“Oh uh, no,” Chanyeol says, shifting on his feet. “Me and Kyungsoo we’re uh…actually just coming to say hi. Or, bye? Hi and bye?”

“We’re leaving,” Kyungsoo says, using his shoulder to push Chanyeol away from the counter and toward the door.

“I’m saving my tickets,” Chanyeol says over his shoulder in a hurry; Kyungsoo is relentless, pushing him along with an unfailing persistence. Chanyeol turns back again, struggling to keep upright against Kyungsoo’s firm grip on his sides, “I’m gonna get the best prize here!” He smiles, almost too big for his face. “That!”

They’re out the door before Baekhyun gets a chance to look back, to follow where Chanyeol’s finger was pointing, but he knows. He already knows what that idiotic giant was pointing toward. Baekhyun would agree it’s the best prize, the only thing in the whole place worth saving up for. The one prize Baekhyun has been saving his very own tickets for.

“That son of a bitch,” he says, his fist so tight his nails dig into his palms. “That’s my giant teddy bear.” From beside him, Jongin chuckles and Baekhyun grits his teeth and kicks at Jongin’s legs, successfully knocking him off the chair, onto the floor with a pained groan.

 

 

Baekhyun ups his play time. He even, very reluctantly, slips some of his own hard earned cash into a token machine for the first time since he’d gotten the job. He refuses to let Chanyeol get the bear before him; he’s been working too hard for the past two months to let it slip through his fingers now. He won’t accept defeat. Even if it means spending more time than he’d like at work once his shift ends.

It’s a Wednesday and Baekhyun’s shift had been short. He had a class on campus earlier in the day, most of his classes he takes online because he hates people, and he’s ready to spend the hour before closing winning some tickets.

He slips four tokens into a machine, his favorite game, the only one he’s half-decent at, and glares at his hand on the button. Sure, he’s no _Chanyeol-arcade-game-stupid-wizard-extraordinaire_ , but he sure as hell is going to try his best.

The game is simple enough and requires little skill, just timing and luck, really. It’s a tall machine, looks similar to a crane machine, but the bottom spins and has little holes with ticket amounts on them. All you have to do is hit the button to drop a ball, and hope it lands in the jackpot, or at least a high-ticket amount. Easy enough. He slams the button, only partially wishing it was Chanyeol’s face, and the ball drops, lands in the 25 slot. He groans. _Chanyeol would probably get the jackpot_ , he whispers begrudgingly.

He hits the button again and again, getting no more than 30 tickets at once, and running annoyingly low on tokens already. It’s much easier to carelessly run out of tokens when he hasn’t paid for them himself. Again and again, he gets low scores, and he only gets more annoyed with each play.

He’s staring at the machine with a furious concentration when the jackpot bell rings out from the twin machine beside the one he’s at.

“Did you see that? Right in the jackpot on the first try!”

Baekhyun digs his heel into the hideously stained carpet and pivots, a dangerous glare already forming on his face. “You,” he seethes, because who would it be of course, besides Chanyeol.

Chanyeol is ecstatic about his win; Baekhyun eyes the ticket counter, he’d just won 1750 tickets in one go. He hates Chanyeol. And, he hates his stupid big ears too.

“Want me to show you how to do it?” Chanyeol says excitedly, motioning toward his machine. “It’s really easy.”

“I can do it myself, thanks,” Baekhyun hisses, then slams his fist down on the button. He gets 4 tickets and he wants to die, wants to roll his eyes so hard into the back of his head they detach and he just dies.

“Here, watch.” Chanyeol’s eyes move in a slow circle, following the rotation of the machine. He’s holding his hand over the button, just waiting. Baekhyun is annoyed and becoming increasingly impatient. “Now!” Chanyeol hits the button, a quick little tap unlike the way Baekhyun punches it, and Baekhyun can almost feel his arm swinging to punch Chanyeol when the ball lands right in the jackpot…again. Two in a row.

“That’s not fair,” Baekhyun sputters, trying to dig into the depths of his brain for a fitting insult. “I’ve been here for like twenty minutes and only have like 100 tickets, and you have…” He pauses to look at the pile on the floor building around Chanyeol’s legs, tickets are still spewing from the machine.

“It’s like…3000,” Chanyeol says with a bright smile. Baekhyun rips his ticket stream from the machine and walks away, having to talk himself out of flipping Chanyeol off as he passes through the doors.

 

 

Baekhyun doesn’t live in the dorms on campus, but he might as well. His apartment is tiny, and his bedroom is even smaller, and the angry little ball he’s curled up in on his bed is even smaller still. He’s on his side staring at the wall, the television buzzing low from somewhere behind him, and he’s still pissed off. It’s been well over an hour since his run in with Chanyeol, but he just can’t shake the anger.

He knows he’s being a petty baby, but he just really wants that bear. It’s as tall as he is and pink and really fucking soft. He wants it to cuddle at night when it’s cold and his shitty apartment heat isn’t working well enough. Or, when he’s been drinking alone and wants a partner to dance drunk with to old One Direction songs. That’s _his_ bear.

A knock at his door makes him sigh and groan; he hadn’t planned on getting up anytime within the next hour or so. But he does, and he shuffles slowly across the carpet, heaving another larger sigh when he twists the knob.

His roommate, Minseok, is easily his favorite person in the world. Baekhyun hasn’t known him for half as long as some of his other friends, but somehow, Minseok just _gets him_. Also, there was that weird month long period where they fucked like rabbits; literally every flat surface in the apartment has one or both of their naked ass prints on it, but they don’t like to talk about that. Baekhyun calls him Min for short, or Minnie when he’s feeling cute and needy for snuggles on the couch, and he can never resist pinching his little round cheeks that so contrast his rock-hard body. Minseok insists he hates it, but he’s never actually told Baekhyun not to do it.

Baekhyun fixes a pout onto his lips and leans into Minseok forehead first, letting himself fall limp into Minseok’s arms. “Minnie,” he whines, then buries his face in his neck.

“Should I make hot chocolate?” Baekhyun lets his pout intensify and he looks up and nods.

“So, who hurt you today?” Minseok asks as he hands off a mug to Baekhyun and sits at the other end of their shared couch. He makes a face when Baekhyun digs his bare toes under his thigh; they’re cold, but he lets him.

“No one hurt me.” He takes a large gulp of his hot chocolate and sighs. “That big idiot at the arcade just pissed me off.”

Minseok hums, the only real sign that he’s paying attention because his eyes are focused on the television across from him. Soccer is on and it’s the only thing in his life he cares about other than Baekhyun and school…and his family, of course. He tenses, balls his fists, and then groans when some team, Baekhyun assumes it’s the one Minseok doesn’t like, scores.

Baekhyun frowns and decides to dig his foot into Minseok’s cheek. “Pay attention to meeee!” he whines, “You know I’m a needy bitch!”

Minseok tries hard to keep the smile off his face as he sighs, rolls his eyes. He turns to face Baekhyun. “I’m sorry princess, would you like me to stop everything I’m doing and just stare at you as you talk for an hour?”

“Well…” Baekhyun’s pout turns into a small smile, “Actually, that’d be nice.” He bounces up onto his knees and falls into Minseok’s lap, curling his limbs all around him anyway he can. “Refer to me as princess from now on too, I like that.”

Minseok doesn’t even answer, just pushes Baekhyun off him and onto the floor. “If you need me, I’ll be doing homework in my room,” he stops in his doorway, smirks, then adds, “princess.”

 

 

“What?”

Baekhyun pulls his phone away from his ear, blinks in disbelief and scoffs. “ _What_? Is that really how you answer the phone? You monster.”

Jongin sighs, the kind of sigh he gives Baekhyun when he’s annoyed with him. “I’m…busy. What do you want?”

Baekhyun purses his lips, narrows his eyes. He gasps. “Are you getting laid right now? Oh my god, is that what’s happening?” He knows he’s in line at Starbucks, and he knows he’s being loud, but it doesn’t stop him from bouncing excitedly at the thought that Jongin just answered his call mid-fuck.

“I’m…what? Dude, no.”

Baekhyun instantly deflates. “Oh, well boo you.” He narrows his eyes, hearing a soft sigh from the other end of the phone, something else sounding eerily like a weak, distant moan. “So, what are you up to then?” he asks cautiously, not wanting to give away his suspicion.

“You called me, what do you w-want?”

“A grande mocha frappe, soy, no whip. Thanks!” He giggles at the pretty girl taking his order as he swipes his card, switching his phone to his other hand quickly. “Sorry, I’m getting coffee right now. Anyway, I was calling to see if you…” He pauses to sign his receipt and throw a dollar in the girl’s tip jar. Just as he’s about to speak again he’s stopped by a very distinct whimper crying out through the phone. His jaw drops, scandalized.

“Nini, hang up and fu—“

The voice cuts off abruptly and Baekhyun stands still. That was most definitely a guy’s voice calling out for Jongin, calling him ‘Nini’, asking him to fuck him. The laugh that leaves Baekhyun is menacing, Disney villain worthy. He grabs his drink when his name is called and types up a quick text.

_To Jongin:_  
_i knew you were into guys!!!! i’m never wrogn abt this stuff why didnt you ever tell me :( :( :(_

He doesn’t expect a reply, not right away anyway, so he slips his phone into his pocket and makes his way to the door.

Outside, there are multitudes of students walking, running, one kid is on a skateboard cruising down the crowded sidewalk. Baekhyun hates coming to this particular Starbucks because he always, _always_ runs into…

“Sehun,” Baekhyun says, not even trying to hide the dread in his voice. He watches the tall blonde walk toward him, waving his arms much too enthusiastically for how busy the sidewalk is. Baekhyun knows he’s already been spotted, so he doesn’t try to hide like he normally would; he just puts on his best fake grin and braces himself.

“Hi, Baekhyun!” Sehun’s eyes seem to glimmer as he steps in front of the shorter, older boy. He smiles big, bright; Baekhyun wonders if his cheeks ache from it. “We always seem to run into each other here, huh?”

Baekhyun is in his last year of college; he’s had lots of time to learn new things and make plenty of mistakes. Sehun is one of those mistakes. Sehun is, arguably, the worst mistake, made in a beer induced stupor at an end of the year party last year.

“Seems so,” Baekhyun says, chuckling awkwardly. Sehun is pushed by a passerby suddenly and they bump into each other; a memory of Sehun’s naked body pressed against his flashes through his mind and he shakes the thought away. “I should get going.”

“Oh,” Sehun says, eyes downcast, “Okay…okay yeah, you’re probably busy.” He bites at his bottom lip and Baekhyun can tell he has to force himself to look up. “I’ll see you around?”

He sounds so hopeful, it’s so pathetic and Baekhyun feels awful, but he just doesn’t feel that way about Sehun. “Yeah,” he smiles, deciding to indulge Sehun because Baekhyun can’t handle hurting people’s feelings, “I’m sure we’ll bump into each other again.”

They part ways, Sehun toward campus and Baekhyun in the other direction, toward his work. He thinks about that night with Sehun, the events that caused the freshmen to fall so hard for him. He wishes he could go back and undo what he did; sure it was good sex, great sex, but Sehun is a bit obsessed with him now. Baekhyun blames himself. He should have controlled himself, kept his dick in his pants, but he was drunk and Sehun was so pretty, is so pretty, and he let himself fall into bed (actually it was the bathtub at a frat house) with a sweet, young freshman.

But god, was the sex ever good. Hot and sticky, sloppy drunk hands roaming everywhere, the desperation in their grinding hips, Sehun’s shoulder bumping the handle and turning the shower on. Baekhyun can, at least, look back on that fondly, think about it sometimes when he’s getting off alone in his room. He stops dead in his tracks and shakes his head, tells himself to think about literally anything else.

 

 

He makes it to work just in time to be only ten minutes late. The smile he gives to his boss, Junmyeon, gets him out of bathroom duty and he marks that as a win in his book.

It’s Friday, but it’s still early, so the arcade is pretty dead. There are a few high school kids skipping school and a couple parents with children too young for school. He finds himself bored quickly, sitting in his little chair flipping through the same magazine he’s been reading for the past three weeks, the one he keeps under the counter as an emergency something to do.

His ass vibrates and he leans to the side to pull his phone out of his back pocket.

_From Jongin:  
y the fuck would i tell u?? i already came out once didnt rly feel like doing it again_

_To Jongin:  
gonna change ur name to nini in my phone ;p who was that btw his voice was really sexy_

_From Jongin:  
i literally fuckin hate u dont u dare change my name to that_

_To Nini:_  
_tooooooo late…… NINI_

Baekhyun gets his phone taken away by Junmyeon, which he pouts about for the next hour until Jongin shows up for his shift. He instantly perks up when Jongin rounds the corner, stepping behind the counter to grab his hat he keeps hung on a hook in the wall.

Jongin places his hand over Baekhyun’s entire face, pushes him back into his previous seated position. “Just don’t. I will seriously kill you.”

“But _Nini_!” Baekhyun whines, making obscene kissy faces at him. He reaches his arms out, slapping at Jongin’s ass and thighs, giggling at each weak punch he dodges. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry! I’ll stop.”

They sit beside each other in silence for a while. Baekhyun has always liked Jongin, and Jongin Baekhyun, no matter how annoying Baekhyun may be. They work well together, complain together, and occasionally get drunk on weekends together. Jongin is two years older, inches taller, and was the one who showed Baekhyun the ropes when he was first hired in at the arcade. Baekhyun would never actually tell him, but he really admires Jongin; he’s smart and kind, and very sincere in everything he says and does. He’s a good guy.

Jongin’s one fault, though Baekhyun wouldn’t label it that because he does the same, is that he likes to sleep around. And, until today, Baekhyun assumed it was all the lovely ladies’ hearts around campus he was breaking. Jongin is attractive, devastatingly so, but Baekhyun wouldn’t necessarily say he’s attracted to him. He’d fuck him, sure, if the offer was ever put on the table, but that’s about the extent of his attraction.

“You’re staring at me.”

Baekhyun blinks and gives Jongin a wide grin. “So, who was it that you we’re fucking when I called?”

Jongin laughs, literally bursts into a raucous laughter right in Baekhyun’s face; the kind of laugh where he has to reach out and punch Baekhyun in the shoulder over and over. He composes himself, wipes the tears forming in the corner of his eyes, and rubs at where he’d punched Baekhyun. “Oh, it’s cute that you really think I’d tell you that.”

“You’re so mean,” Baekhyun pouts. “Come on, just tell me! Is it someone I know?” He turns his head to scan the room; Jongdae is sweeping, Taehyung is sanitizing machines, and Luhan is sitting in a chair in one of the reserved party rooms sleeping. There’s also Amber and Krystal, but now that he knows Jongin’s preference he doesn’t worry about them. “Is it someone we work with?” he asks excitedly.

“I’m…no it’s not someone we work with. I’m not telling you. It’s none of your business.”

Baekhyun jumps up and slams his hands on the counter, throwing a mild temper tantrum. “Oh, come _onnn_ , Nini! Tell me! I need to know who you were dicking down at 11am!”

“Excuse me?”

Baekhyun’s eyes widen and he prays that when he turns around there isn’t a small child standing on the other side of the counter. “Oh,” he perks up, “Kyungsoo, thank god you’re not a kid.” He laughs and pretends to wipe nervous sweat from his forehead. “What can I do for you?”

“I just…uh. The token machine isn’t taking my money so I wanted to see if I could get tokens with my card?”

“Yeah, sure.”

 

 

Baekhyun decides to stay after his shift today and play some games. He’s on a mission to win big. He takes his free tokens from the bin under the counter and even snags an extra $20 worth that he tells Junmyeon to take from his next check.

He steps up to the same machine and fixes a serious look on his face. “It’s bear time.” Then, he leans in close, presses his cheek to the cool glass, and whispers, “Please be good to me.”

Before he gets the chance to press the button, the buzzer on the machine beside him is going off. Okay, he’s actually going to scream if he turns and sees Chanyeol.

“WHY?!”

Chanyeol looks confused, and a little scared, and Baekhyun had screamed so loud he jumped and clutched his chest. “Why did you scream?”

“Why are you next to me?” He points an accusatory finger in Chanyeol’s face. “Do you literally just wait until I come to this machine so you can stand next to me and show me how much better at the game you are than me?” Baekhyun looks thoroughly offended and he hits the button on his machine on accident; he gets a 4.

“No. I just…like this game is all.” Chanyeol looks hurt, like he’d just been scolded by his mother. “I’m sorry?”

“Whatever,” Baekhyun snaps. He turns his attention back to his machine and huffs angrily. He plays a few rounds, the silence between himself and Chanyeol breeds guilt within Baekhyun. He feels bad for yelling at him. He really doesn’t like hurting people’s feelings. “I’m sorry,” he says as his ball lands in the 35. The next ball lands in the 15. “I’m sorry for yelling,” he looks up at Chanyeol, “You’re just so good it’s aggravating.”

The corner of Chanyeol’s lips curl into a small smile. “I could show you,” he says, motioning to the game, “I could show you the timing.”

“This game is all luck,” Baekhyun says matter-of-factly.

Chanyeol pushes Baekhyun aside as he shakes his head. “But it’s not. Watch.” He leans in, fully concentrated. “You just…wait until the 4 is lined up to that corner,” he points to the back left and then taps the button. The ball falls directly into the jackpot spot and he turns, proud, to smile at Baekhyun. “See?”

“Lucky shot,” Baekhyun mumbles as he retakes his place in front of the machine. He watches the bottom spin, eyes following the 4, and he taps the button right where Chanyeol said to. It almost bounces out, but it doesn’t, the ball lands right in the jackpot. Again. Baekhyun doesn’t believe it.

“Lucky shot?” Chanyeol laughs and puts his hands up in surrender when Baekhyun glares at him.

They play side by side in silence for a while. Baekhyun hits the jackpot on his own a couple more times and does some hard-core side eyeing, peeping on Chanyeol still content beside him. He thinks Chanyeol is cute, a fleeting thought, but it’s there, and he pushes it away just as fast as it came.

After a few more minutes Chanyeol wanders off to play other games. Baekhyun wishes he was good enough at other games to play them, but he’d just be wasting his tokens. He looks down at his cup; he’s almost out.

 

 

When he gets back to his apartment Minseok is sleeping on the couch; the television is on and the calculus book on Minseok’s chest is slowly sliding onto the floor. Baekhyun creeps over slowly and plucks the book up to set it on the table. He smiles when Minseok grumbles something in his sleep and rolls over, wrapping an arm around Baekhyun’s leg.

“Cuddle.”

“But I have homework,” Baekhyun says softly, running fingers through Minseok’s hair. In his sleepy daze Minseok pouts and Baekhyun breaks, gives in to Minseok’s cute face. He sighs at his weakness and climbs onto the couch, pressing his chest against Minseok’s.

It’s nice, very cozy and so, so warm he can feel himself falling asleep, homework be damned. He realizes he’s going to let himself nap so he rearranges himself into a more comfortable position on his side, his legs tucked between Minseok’s. He nuzzles his face into Minseok’s neck and sighs out in bliss; cuddling with Minseok is the best thing in the world.

When he wakes up it’s much darker in the room and they’ve moved in their sleep. He has to stop himself from laughing so he doesn’t wake Minseok. They’ve both twisted around and now have their lips pressed together.

Baekhyun leans back slightly, “Minnie,” he whispers. “Min, wake up.” Minseok blinks himself awake and it’s cute, too cute. Baekhyun loves sleepy Minseok. “We were kissing in our sleep.” This time he lets himself laugh and this wakes Minseok up fully and he joins in the laughter.

Minseok rolls over, crushing Baekhyun’s arm in the process, then elbows him in the ribs. Minseok takes Baekhyun’s knee to his crotch and there’s a mix of groaning and laughing.

They spend a little time after finally getting off the couch cleaning. It’s long overdue; the dishes are piled in the sink and the bathroom probably needs a hazmat team to come in and scrub it down (they have to rock, paper, scissors to decide who cleans that). Baekhyun does dishes while Minseok grabs a mask and rubber gloves, a mop and a roll of paper towels, and marches into the bathroom, fearing for his life. They play music throughout the apartment and stop about an hour in to have a duet in the living room.

When cleaning is done they’re both wiped out and it’s well passed dinner time so they order pizza, hopping on the couch to find a movie on Netflix before the food arrives.

They’re both fully comfortable on the couch when the pizza arrives, too tired to stand and too tangled in the warm blankets. So, Baekhyun just shouts that the door is open. They hear a confused “Uhhh” from the other side of the door and Baekhyun giggles, snuggling closer into Minseok’s side so he can reach his wallet in the pocket of his jeans he’d just kicked off before he’d curled into the blanket.

The door opens, Baekhyun stretches out the cash in his hand, wide smile on his face, and then he can’t stop the displeased groan from leaving his mouth.

“Baekhyun?”

“Sehun?”

Minseok glances between the two, sensing the tension. He knows the story, the history between them, and he knows that Sehun still craves affection and attention from Baekhyun. He knows how this must look, him and Baekhyun cuddled up under a blanket, Baekhyun’s pants lying on the floor beside them. Poor little Sehun.

“I’m sorry,” Sehun says, eyes downcast and cheeks burning red. “It’s uh…um, $14.34.”

Baekhyun hands over a twenty and tells Sehun to keep the change. Sehun is sulking, they both can see it, as he walks back to the door. He stops and turns, then clears his throat. “You guys look cute t-together.” And then, he’s gone.

“Well,” Minseok says, mouth full of pizza, “That was fuckin’ awkward.”

Baekhyun chews, swallows, then lets out a loud laugh. “Maybe he’ll get over me now that I have a boyfriend that I apparently look cute with.” Minseok rolls his eyes and pushes him away.

 

 

Baekhyun is furiously typing on his laptop, glasses at the tip of his nose dangerously close to slipping off and onto his desk. He’s running strictly off coffee and protein bars he’d stolen out of Minseok’s cabinet in the kitchen.

It’s currently 4:13am and Baekhyun hasn’t slept. He forgot about an essay due in his psychology class in, he checks the clock across the room and whines, four hours. He huffs and straightens his glasses; he can totally do this.

Aside from the essay, he’s also forgotten about reading he was supposed to have done for a partner project they’ll be starting in class today. He only hopes whoever he gets partnered with will have done that part for them.

He finishes his essay with just enough time to toast three pieces of bread and run out the door. He sprints across campus, still in his pajamas, piece of toast hanging from his mouth, and a pain in his side. He really should start hitting the gym with Minseok, he thinks.

He walks into class beside the professor who gives him a raise of his eyebrows, and then he takes his seat at the back. Everyone passes up their papers and then waits for partner assignments to be announced. Baekhyun prays he doesn’t get the annoying girl who sits a few seats over; she’s always watching YouTube on her phone instead of paying attention.

“Baekhyun! I’ll partner you with,” the professor looks around the room, “Chanyeol.”

Baekhyun’s eyes narrow, there’s no way it’s the same Chanyeol from— A boy at the very front turns and waves enthusiastically. Of course it’s the same Chanyeol from work.

 

 

“Jongin, I might have to take you up on your offer to kill me.” He switches his phone to his other hand as he grabs his coffee from the barista. He waits for Jongin to stop laughing and ask why. “Chanyeol is in my psychology class and I just got fucking partnered with him for this huge project.”

“He’s in your class? Why haven’t you ever mentioned that?”

Baekhyun grits his teeth and groans. “I never noticed! I had no idea he was in the class with me until like three hours ago!” He sips his coffee, a little dribbles down his chin and he wipes it with his sleeve. “I just had to sit and talk to him in a fucking Starbucks for like an hour.”

“Did you make him pay for your coffee?”

“Obviously,” Baekhyun rolls his eyes. “I bought another one on the way out, but he paid for the first two.”

They continue to chat as Baekhyun walks. He tells Jongin about how weird it was having to speak to Chanyeol for such a long period of time, how weird it was to see him outside of the arcade. He complains about how tired he is and how he’s vibrating from so much caffeine, and finally hangs up as he walks into the arcade and waves at Jongin sitting behind the counter.

“Do you guys want to go get wasted tonight?” Jongdae and Luhan are standing on the other side of the counter, Luhan’s bouncing excitedly as he waits for an answer.

Jongin gives Baekhyun a skeptical look. “Guys, I’m literally a twenty-four-year-old man, I don’t want to get drunk in some shitty freshmen dorm with you and all your other little friends.”

Jongdae scoffs, “Neither do we, gross.”

“It’s a frat party, for your information, old man,” Luhan says, sticking his tongue out. “Don’t know the name of it, but it’s that huge one at the center of campus.”

Baekhyun and Jongin share another look. “We’re in,” they say in unison.

 

 

“Ass off the couch and into some tight little pants!” Baekhyun shouts at Minseok as he bursts into the apartment, Jongin following behind him. “We’ve got a frat party tonight.”

Minseok has a piece of leftover pizza hanging from his mouth which he rips out with one hand. He jumps up and salutes Baekhyun before scurrying off to his room to change. Baekhyun does the same, rips his closet door open and begins digging for his favorite pair of shredded skinny jeans. He calls them his lucky jeans because he always gets lucky when he wears them to parties. And that’s Baekhyun’s only goal for this party tonight, get laid.

 

 

The party is loud and raging by the time they arrive. A kid is already pantsless and passed out in the yard and, as they walk to the open front door, a girl is holding heels in her hands, crying on the steps.

They meet Jongdae and Luhan inside and are led to where the drinks are. Red cups are filled with beer, Baekhyun dares to try the mystery punch in the large bowl on the counter; it’s green and intimidating, but he’s really looking to get fucked up tonight.

Baekhyun ends up in the living room switching between dancing with Minseok and Jongin. Both are much better dancers than he is, but he’s just here to have fun, not win any awards. So, he sways his hips and throws his head back, grinning wide when hands grab at his hips. He laces his fingers with the hands on him and pushes his ass back; he thinks it’s Minseok holding him by the way the body feels against his back.

The four cups of mystery punch have his inhibitions nearly gone, so he turns around in Minseok’s hold and kisses him. He hums, pleased when a tongue slips into his mouth, drags across his own; the hands still on his hips squeeze and slide up to his waist. The kiss moves to his neck and he moans into Minseok’s ear; he can hardly hear it over the music, but he knows Minseok could definitely hear the desperation in it.

“Should we keep dancing, or do you wanna take this upstairs?” he slurs, lips still pressed to Minseok’s ear. He bites his earlobe and giggles, loving the hands that have slipped into his back pockets. His lucky jeans never fail him.

He almost screams when he leans back, finally opening his eyes. “Sehun?! What the fuck are you doing?” Sehun looks just as confused as Baekhyun who’s looking around; Minseok is nowhere in sight.

“I’m…I was…we were dancing and you kissed me, I-I thought it was okay.” His eyes are wide and terrified, looking like a child caught doing something they shouldn’t have been. “I’m-I’m sorry!” He steps away from Baekhyun and crosses his arms over his chest, eyes looking dangerously close to tearing up. “I ran into your friend from the other day and we got to talking and he said that you guys aren’t dating. I thought this way okay. I’m sorry.” He bites his lip and his chin quivers. “You kissed me…I’m sorry.” He makes a pained, crushed face and turns away, disappearing into the crowd.

Baekhyun has to go outside to get some fresh air, sober himself up a bit. What the fuck had he just done? How did that even happen? How did he not notice his friends abandoning him on the dancefloor? “They better be getting some,” he sulks.

The backyard has a really nice patio with tons of tables and chairs. There are a few people scattered around, most of them smoking; a couple girls are making out in a secluded corner. He pouts and takes a seat on the stone steps.

He thinks about all the poor choices he’s made in his life. Dropping acid that time in his freshmen year, coming out in high school thinking no one would make fun of him, the time he slapped his cousin. His drunk brain is swimming with thoughts of all his mistakes. And Sehun, fucking Oh Sehun, is the mistake that has haunted him for a year. He tears up and tries hard to keep them from falling; he’ll blame this on the alcohol tomorrow.

“You okay?”

A shadow falls over Baekhyun and he looks up. Perfect. “Hey, Chanyeol, yeah I’m fine. Fucking great, actually.” He wraps his arms around himself and sighs.

Chanyeol sits beside him and offers his cup out. Baekhyun takes it and chugs until it’s empty, throwing the cup away into the grass. He wipes his mouth with the back of his hand and burps. “Thank you…needed that.”

“So, how come you’re sitting out here all alone?”

Chanyeol’s voice is gentle, soothing, and Baekhyun is grateful for that. “Just…things in there got a little too much for me to handle.” He laughs at himself, at the absurd situation he’d gotten himself into. “What are you doing here?” He looks over and Chanyeol is grinning at him.

“This is my frat. I live here.”

“Of course you do.”

“Sehun lives here, too.” Chanyeol leans back, stretching his legs out in front of him. “So what was up with you guys kissing and then you running away?”

“You saw that?” Baekhyun grimaces; of course Chanyeol and Sehun know each other. “We kind of have a weird history and—“

“Oh trust me,” Chanyeol interrupts with a small chuckle, “he’s told me all about his crush on you. Everyone knows how much he likes you.”

Baekhyun pouts now, pulls his knees up to his chest and rests his chin on them. “I don’t know why he likes me so much. I hate it; I feel bad because I don’t feel the same and he’s just…he has so many _feelings_.”

There’s a long pause.

“Yeah,” Chanyeol finally says, “Sehun’s good, but he’s got a soft heart.” He bumps shoulders with Baekhyun and smiles when Baekhyun looks up at him. “Don’t feel so bad. He likes you now, but he’ll get over it. It just takes him longer than the average person.”

Baekhyun can feel the effects of the drink he’d chugged setting in. His skin is warming and his gums are tingly. He giggles. “You know, I didn’t know we had psych together until literally today.”

Chanyeol makes a face, slightly offended, mostly amused. “Probably because you always barge in just in time or late.”

“Are you good? At psychology, I mean?” He turns to give Chanyeol one of his smiles where his eyes disappear, all teeth and cheeks. “Because like, I’m gonna let you know now I’m only taking this class because I have to and also I may not have done any reading for this project.”

Chanyeol sighs, but he’s smiling. “Luckily for you, I’m a psych major.”

“My savior.”

“Hey, you want to come see my room?”

Baekhyun stares at Chanyeol, tilts his head and just stares. He blinks a few times, keeping all emotion from his face, but he can’t help it when he smirks a little. “Are you asking me what I think you’re asking me? Because I gotta tell you, I’m not drunk enough for that anymore. The whole Sehun thing kinda killed my buzz.”

Chanyeol’s confusion is obvious, but then his eyes are widening in realization and he jumps up, hands out and shaking between Baekhyun and himself. “Oh! Oh, no! That-that’s totally not…I wasn’t trying to…I wouldn’t…”

Baekhyun is amused with Chanyeol’s nervous stuttering, and the way he can’t bring himself to meet his eyes. He knows he should stop smiling and say something, but he’s really enjoying the way Chanyeol is freaking out. So, he moves to sit cross-legged and sits up properly, pulling his bottom lip between his teeth to attempt hiding his cheeky grin.

“Like I know we just met each other kinda and like…I just, wouldn’t do that. You know?” Chanyeol’s brows are furrowed when he finally meets Baekhyun’s gaze. “I just know you weren’t into the party anymore, so I thought I could show you my room.”

Baekhyun keeps quiet as he holds eye contact with Chanyeol. He releases his bottom lip and lets a full smile form now, giving Chanyeol a view of his perfect teeth. Chanyeol’s eyes narrow.

“You fucking suck,” he pouts, kicking at Baekhyun’s foot when he starts laughing. “You could have said something before I dove into a full apology.”

“It was cute,” Baekhyun says before he realizes it, and then he’s blushing at the admission, getting to his feet and letting out a deep breath. “Let’s go get another drink and then you can _show me your room_ ,” he says with a wink.

Chanyeol’s room isn’t at all what Baekhyun expected. He’d assumed, that because it’s in a frat house, the room would be a mess of empty takeout boxes and red cups, clothes and used condoms. But it’s not; it’s actually ten times cleaner than Baekhyun’s room has ever been since he moved into his apartment two years ago.

“What?” Chanyeol asks as he watches Baekhyun take in his surroundings. “Not what you expected?”

Baekhyun gulps down half his drink as he shakes his head. “Not at all,” he says, turning to grin at Chanyeol. “It’s missing the typical frat house details.

“And those are?”

“You know,” Baekhyun chuckles; Chanyeol moves closer to him, “Like the garbage, the stinky boy smell, condoms and girl’s panties everywhere.”

Chanyeol snorts into his cup and shakes his head, “You’re ridiculous, you know that?”

Baekhyun looks, really looks, at Chanyeol. He’s tall and slim, dressed nicely in dark jeans and a cardigan. He’s handsome with his dark hair pushed back and the soft yellow lighting contouring his face. “I know,” he finally says, “I’m fucking crazy.”


	2. Chapter 2

Baekhyun remembers freshmen year, the first party he’d went to as a young, naïve, fresh out of high school kid who had no idea what was waiting for him on the other side of the door. That night was the most drunk he’d ever been; the next morning was the first hangover he’d ever had, and he promised himself he’d never let it happen again. Baekhyun broke that promise last night. Actually, he destroyed it, put it in a spaceship and sent that bitch to the sun.

He was fucked up, beyond fucked up.

He can remember flashes of the night; he remembers Chanyeol’s room, Chanyeol going out every so often to bring them more drinks as they talked about their project. He remembers the conversation drifting as they drank more, but he doesn’t remember what they talked about.

At one point, he’s pretty sure Minseok was dragging him around by the wrist, yelling something at him about not being able to leave him alone for two seconds. No, he’s absolutely sure that happened because he remembers losing his balance and tripping, taking Minseok down with him. Did he make out with Minseok on the hardwood floor at the frat house? No. Well, probably; he doesn’t remember, but that sounds like something he’d do under the influence of lethal amounts of liquor.

He woke up this morning on the living room floor of his own apartment, thankfully; Minseok was on the couch beside him, still passed out, snoring softly. It was almost peaceful, but then he sat up, opened his mouth to speak, then slapped a hand over his mouth as he raced to make it to the bathroom before the puke came up.

So, he’s at work, nursing a mean hangover. The screaming children are doing nothing to help him and the fluorescent lighting is even worse than the noise. He groans and sips from his water bottle. Jongin isn’t much better; he’s been sighing in the seat beside Baekhyun, rearranging and groaning with each movement. Frats really know how to throw a good party.

It isn’t until after they order lunch from the sandwich shop next door that they start feeling better. They sit in the breakroom alone, across from each other at the large round table, and eat in silence.

“So,” Jongin says, voice raspy, “Where’d you disappear off to last night? Minseok was looking around for you and couldn’t find you.”

Baekhyun slows his chewing; should he lie? “Um,” he swallows, “I uh, may have ended up hanging out with Chanyeol in his room.”

Jongin’s eyebrow raises. “Hanging out?”

“Yes,” Baekhyun grumbles, “hanging out. We sat and talked and figured out what we’re gonna do for our project…and drank so much mystery punch.”

“And then fucked?”

“Dude, what the fuck?” He fakes a gag, “Gross. Chanyeol? No.” He fights down a sudden nausea and swallows another bite.

“You think he’s into guys though?”

Baekhyun rolls his eyes, “I have no idea. I told you, we talked about our project and that’s it.”

Jongin leaves the conversation at that, but keeps the smug smile for the rest of their break. He knows Baekhyun and how Baekhyun thinks, and he knows that the smile will bother him.

The slow day moves even slower after lunch and Baekhyun just wants to go home, to curl up in his bed with his head under his pillow as he tries to keep himself from throwing up anymore (he’d already run to the bathroom twice at work to puke); he just can’t handle hangovers like he used to anymore.

The end of the day finally comes and Baekhyun couldn’t be happier. He’s all ready to go, stuff packed up and in his arms, and then Chanyeol walks in with a big smile and an excited wave his way.

“You look terrible,” Chanyeol says as he approaches Baekhyun; Jongin snickers behind him.

“Thanks,” Baekhyun deadpans, “I feel terrible. You nearly gave me alcohol poisoning with all the drinks last night.”

Chanyeol laughs, boisterous and animated, smacking at his own thigh. “I’m sorry. I sometimes forget that everyone doesn’t drink like my frat brothers. But in my defense, you kept accepting the drinks.” He turns to slip money into the token machine and starts colleting them in his cup when they begin shooting out of the slot. “Did you wanna play a few games with me?” he asks, looking back to Baekhyun.

Baekhyun doesn’t know whether Chanyeol or Jongin is giving him a harder stare. He wants to go home, but Chanyeol just looks so hopeful. He sighs on the inside, but gives in with a nod and a small smile. “Yeah, sure. Why not?”

They stand side-by-side, both focused, both silent. Baekhyun is concentrated on what he’s doing, secretly aggravated at how terrible he is at this game that Chanyeol had convinced him to try. It’s some dumb timing game where you have to get a light to stop in the right spot and he can’t do it. With each win Chanyeol gets, Baekhyun’s aggravation only grows. Finally, he huffs and stomps his foot, turning away from his machine.

“How do you do it?” he asks, looking up to Chanyeol with wide eyes. “How do you just win at everything, all the time? How?”

Chanyeol looks confused, a little bashful, but he grins. “I don’t know…I’m just lucky? I’m really good at timing these things,” he pats the side of the machine he’s at. “I can show you, if you want?”

Baekhyun has to literally swallow down a scream, grit his teeth, and take a deep breath. “Please?” he says, totally not sounding desperate.

“Okay watch,” Chanyeol says with a smile. He slips behind Baekhyun and reaches an arm around him, placing his hand over Baekhyun’s. “You just gotta keep cool and time it right.”

Baekhyun can’t hear a word Chanyeol is saying over the heartbeat pounding in his ears. The arm wrapped around him and the hand on top of his is an uncomfortable feeling; it has a lump growing in his throat he can’t swallow down. He can feel his muscles tense when Chanyeol leans a little closer. It’s warm and strange and he doesn’t know what to do with someone this close to him.

“Baek?”

Baekhyun blinks and turns, realizing Chanyeol is no longer pressed against him. He looks back to the game and he’d won, well Chanyeol did, did it for him. “I won?”

Chanyeol laughs, puts his hand on the machine beside Baekhyun’s head and leans toward him. “You did.”

He still doesn’t know how to react to what just happened; does Chanyeol like him? Does he just not understand personal space? He needs to speak; he’s just staring at Chanyeol like an idiot. He just won 500 tickets. “Can you show me how to win on other games too?”

Chanyeol smiles.

They stay and play around the arcade for another hour. Baekhyun runs out of tokens and then sticks around to watch Chanyeol kick ass at a few more games. They talk a bit, a little about where to meet up to work on their project, a little about the games they’re playing. It’s nice; Chanyeol is nice, Baekhyun thinks as he listens to Chanyeol ramble on about something funny that happened in one of his classes.

“So, why do you want to win the big bear?”

Chanyeol looks over his shoulder, over to the prize counter, “It’s cute, and huge,” he shrugs. “I just want it.”

Baekhyun pouts behind Chanyeol’s back; he already knows that Chanyeol is going to win the bear before he can, and now he remembers why he’s supposed to hate Chanyeol. But, he can’t bring himself to hate him anymore, not now that he’s gotten the chance to actually get to know him a little. He’s too happy and bubbly, and so god damn likeable that it’s impossible to have any kind of negative feelings for him. He sighs as Chanyeol wins yet another jackpot; he needs to get home and work on his homework. So, he says goodbye and they set up a time to meet up to work on their project.

They text on and off throughout the week. He finds himself smiling at his phone when a text from Chanyeol lights up; it doesn’t mean anything though, Chanyeol is just a fun person to text. Minseok thinks it’s weird, he says, “It’s just interesting, is all,” when Baekhyun informs him that he and Chanyeol never actually talk about their project. He nearly begs Minseok to tell him what he means by that, but Minseok refuses and gives him an indiscernible expression instead.

The next week comes quickly. Chanyeol had been busy with work and classes, so Baekhyun didn’t see him in the arcade much, and he’s almost, kind of excited to hang out with him again. It’s nothing, though, Chanyeol is just cool. Minseok gives him that weird look again.

They agreed to meet up at Baekhyun’s on Friday to finally get started with their project. Chanyeol sent Baekhyun a few articles to read earlier in the week and, of course, Baekhyun said he would read them but didn’t.

 

 

 

“We’re doing _what_?”

“I thought you knew?” Chanyeol sounds as confused as Baekhyun looks mortified. “We literally talked about this all night at the party.”

Baekhyun stops tapping his pen on the desk and glares. “I was drunk as hell, thanks to you. You really thought I remembered what we talked about?”

“I sent you articles on it the other day. Did you not read them?”

Baekhyun gives a sleazy smile, one that says he obviously didn’t even read the titles of the articles.

“You’re the worst partner ever,” Chanyeol teases, clearly amused at Baekhyun’s distress. “Oh come on, it won’t be that bad.”

Silence. Baekhyun just stares. “Sexual dysfunctions, Chanyeol. Literally,” he says, giving the page in his book a quick onceover, “we’re doing a project about sexual sadism.” He lets out a long sigh and leans back in his chair, letting his head hang over the back.

“And masochism,” Chanyeol adds happily; it annoys Baekhyun.

“Whatever, it’s the same thing.”

Chanyeol scoots closer in his chair now, giving Baekhyun a very serious look. “No. No, not at all,” he shakes his head and flips the page of Baekhyun’s book. “Sadism and masochism are totally different.”

Baekhyun leans in, narrows his eyes; he’s ready to argue.

 

 

“Hey Baek, what was that song…Oh my god!”

Baekhyun slams his laptop shut and whips around in his seat, eyes wide and cheeks red with embarrassment. So Minseok had walked in on him and Chanyeol watching some very questionable porn, no big deal, right?

Minseok doesn’t move from the doorway; his hand is still on the knob. He looks like he wants to speak but can’t figure out what words to use.

“It’s for school, I swear. Strictly…educational…porn watching.” He gently elbows Chanyeol and motions for him to agree.

“Yeah. Yeah, it’s for our project. Baekhyun wouldn’t listen to me about the difference between two things and so we were watching to prove my point.”

“Uh-huh,” Minseok says, eyeing them skeptically. “Educational, right.”

“Min, no seriously. It was just—“

“Well, I’m just gonna leave you guys to it then,” Minseok says, backing out of the room slowly. He softly shuts the door, leaving them alone.

“Well,” Baekhyun sighs, “that was weird.”

Chanyeol laughs and reaches over to open the laptop. The video automatically resumes with the sound of a sharp slap and a whimper, and Baekhyun hurries to exit out of the video. “Okay no more of that,” he chuckles awkwardly, “Point proven.”

“Aw, you don’t wanna keep watching porn with me?” Chanyeol pouts and bats his eyelashes, then laughs at his own ridiculousness. “The girl was hot though, you know, under all the bruises and like, blood.”

Baekhyun pauses for a moment, that’s the first mention of his sexuality he’s heard from Chanyeol. Not that he’s curious, really, but he has been a little since Jongin mentioned it the other day. So, Chanyeol thinks the girl in the video was hot; Baekhyun is gay, he doesn’t think she was hot. He stares at Chanyeol, trying to figure out how to respond.

“She was…pretty?” Yep, totally convincing.

Chanyeol blinks. “Pretty? Dude, her boobs were great. Did you not see them?”

Baekhyun feels like he’s being backed into a corner, like he’s back in high school and that big mean senior is bullying the new little gay freshmen. He’s happy with who he is, comfortable with being himself, but he hates this feeling. He hates the uncertainty of people’s reactions to finding out he’s gay. No, he has to already know, right? He is friends with Sehun, after all, and he'd seen them kiss at the party. “Um,” is all he can manage to say as he stares at Chanyeol.

Chanyeol looks away, leans in close to his book like he’s reading; Baekhyun knows he’s not actually reading. He clears his throat. “You know I…I’ve sucked dick before,” Chanyeol isn’t looking at Baekhyun, “It’s…there’s nothing wrong with that.” He does look at Baekhyun now, a sort of embarrassed expression on his face as he bites his lip; he looks…nervous? Which confuses Baekhyun, because why would he be nervous to tell someone who is so clearly gay that they’re a little gay too?

It’s Baekhyun’s turn to stare bashfully at his psychology book. He smiles at the pages. “I’ve um…I’ve only ever uh, sucked dick,” he laughs at himself, feeling ridiculous for saying that, but he looks back to Chanyeol with a small smile. “I’m very gay,” he says, his smile widening at the amused look Chanyeol gives him.

Chanyeol perks up, a wide smile growing on his face. He reaches over and reopens the browser, motioning to the keyboard. “I can find some porn more suitable for you, if you’d like?”

Baekhyun bares his teeth and swats Chanyeol’s hands away from his laptop, shutting the screen and pushing it out of Chanyeol’s reach. “You’re literally the worst. Go home, it’s late.”

“It’s seven.” Baekhyun raises an eyebrow at him. “It’s not late.”

Baekhyun stands and pulls Chanyeol from his chair; he tries his best to push him toward his bedroom door. “Out! Go home you giant idiot.”

Chanyeol laughs at Baekhyun’s effort, he’s pushing but Chanyeol isn’t moving. He grabs Baekhyun’s shoulders and spins him around, grabs him around the waist and picks him up off the ground; Baekhyun immediately begins flailing and shouting. He looks like a little kid, just hanging limply in Chanyeol’s arms, and he hates it, but he can’t stop himself from laughing when Chanyeol beings shaking him around.

“Oh my god!” Baekhyun is wheezing and laughing, “Oh my god, put me down you monster!” Instead of down, Baekhyun goes up, over Chanyeol’s shoulder. His face is dangerously close to Chanyeol’s ass and, speaking of asses, Chanyeol has his hand on Baekhyun’s to keep him in place. “Chanyeol, I swear to god I’m gonna hurt you! Put me down!”

Chanyeol just laughs and spins around, and Baekhyun starts flailing as hard as he can, swinging his arms and kicking his legs. Chanyeol is stumbling, Baekhyun is sure they’re going to tumble over and hit the ground hard. He’s screaming and laughing and smacking Chanyeol in both ass cheeks like bongos, and…the door opens again.

“Okay, I’m not even going to question what the fuck you two are doing this time, but I wanted to ask if you guys wanted pizza because I’m starving.”

Baekhyun shimmies his way down Chanyeol’s body, feet landing softly on the carpet in front of him. They just stare at each other, both with small smiles, and Baekhyun leans over to peek at Minseok from behind Chanyeol, “Yeah, I could eat.”

Minseok and Chanyeol get along surprisingly well and Baekhyun can’t believe it; Minseok usually never likes anyone, or it at least takes time to warm up to new people. But, Chanyeol doesn’t seem to have any trouble getting Minseok to talk or laugh, and Baekhyun’s a little jealous. Minseok wouldn’t even talk to him for a good week after they’d been paired together as roommates in their first year of college. Okay, he’s not actually jealous, it’s more shocked than anything. Chanyeol really is good with people. Baekhyun’s eyes scan Chanyeol’s face as he talks; maybe it’s that great smile of his, or the dimple. He wonders how he’d never noticed the dimple before.

He shakes his head, brings himself back to the conversation he’s supposed to be a part of; he tells himself no more staring at Chanyeol, no matter how attractive he may be. He makes a face at his own thoughts, what the actual fuck is he doing?

“Are you okay?” Minseok asks suddenly, “You look like you’re trying not to shit yourself.”

“What? Oh, yeah I’m fine!” He’s a little too quick to answer and a little too perky. Minseok gives him the _I’ll get you to talk later_ face and goes back to whatever he and Chanyeol we’re discussing.

Against his better judgement, and seemingly against his will, Baekhyun immediately returns to watching Chanyeol talk. He likes the way his lips twitch before he smiles. He likes Chanyeol’s lips in general, really. And, his eyes are pretty. He thinks back to when Chanyeol was holding him and smiles to himself, he’s strong too.

“Is that cool with you?” Minseok asks.

Baekhyun knows he’s got a stupid look on his face, but he can’t help it. He has literally zero idea what he’s just been asked. “Uh, yes.” He can tell Minseok knows he wasn’t paying attention. Damn it why does Minseok know him so well?

“Okay, so why don’t you grab a pillow and a blanket?”

Baekhyun narrows his eyes, his heart skips a beat. Oh god, what did he just agree to?

“God are you like high or something?” Minseok makes a fist and gives Baekhyun’s forehead a couple knocks. “The couch is uncomfortable enough already, go get him something to sleep with.”

Oh, okay. So, that’s what’s happening, Chanyeol is staying over. “He can sleep in my bed.” He goes numb as soon as the words leave his mouth; he’s sure that both Chanyeol and Minseok can see the color leaving his face. When will he learn to keep his big, stupid mouth shut?

“Are you sure?” Chanyeol asks as he reaches for another slice of their now cold pizza. “Like really, I’ve slept in worse places than an uncomfortable couch. I don’t mind.”

“I mean…it…uh…yeah, it’s fine.” He lets out a very ugly, very awkward laugh and digs his nails into his thighs through his jeans. “A lot of sex has happened on this couch and Minseok’s cleaning can only do so much.” _Okay cool, Baekhyun, tell Chanyeol to sleep in your bed with you and talk about sex at the same time_. Perfect. He wishes he could just get up and walk out but he’s in his own apartment.

Chanyeol makes a face, not quite repulsed, and pulls his hands from where they’re resting on the cushions to place them in his lap.

“Please,” Minseok says, “like your bed is any better?”

Baekhyun scoffs and stands, “You know damn well that I almost never make it all the way to my bed when I bring guys home.”

Chanyeol laughs, “I’ll take the bed.” He stands and follows Baekhyun to his room.

“I don’t know if anything I have will fit you, because you’re enormous. My sweats might be capris on you. But it’s—“ _Holy shit, Chanyeol is in his underwear_. His brain stops.

“I mean, I usually sleep like this, but I’ll take your tiny pants.” He watches Baekhyun stare and he laughs, then poses like a bodybuilder. Baekhyun thinks the way his face looked sculpted in the light earlier is nothing compared to his body. “Maybe I should take a shirt, too?” he teases.

“Shut up.” He throws the sweats at Chanyeol’s face and turns back to his closet to find himself something to sleep in. “I warn you,” he says, turning back toward Chanyeol with his fingers curled around the bottom of his shirt, “My physique is incredible, so you might want to look away.”

“I’ll be good,” Chanyeol says, and Baekhyun has to literally bite his tongue to keep himself from saying something inappropriate.

The shirt comes off and drops to the floor, and then he slides his jeans down his legs. He ignores the fact that Chanyeol is totally checking him out and changes quickly, telling himself he’s here to sleep, not to get his ass pounded. When his head pops through the shirt Chanyeol has already tucked himself into the bed and god, does he ever look good in Baekhyun’s bed.

Baekhyun gulps, “I’m gonna go talk to Min for a sec, be right back.”

Minseok opens his door and is immediately forced backward, the door shut and locked.

“What the hell are you doing?”

“Literally…freaking out right now.”

Minseok stares, narrows his eyes, and Baekhyun can see the second Minseok figures it out. “Oh my god! You fucking like him, don’t you?”

Baekhyun clenches his jaw, “Will you be quiet,” he hisses. “And no, I don’t like him…I’d probably like to ride him. Oh my god, Min he took his shirt off and,” his eyes roll back into his head dramatically, “holy fuck, he’s hot.”

“So that’s why you were a fucking airhead the entire time we were talking! You we’re too busy checking him out.” He claps his hands together and smirks, “You were staring at his lips, weren’t you?”

“Why do you know me better than I do? Like honestly, are you psychic or something?”

“If I was psychic we’d live in a penthouse with all the money I won playing the lottery, not in this shitty apartment.”

“Hey,” Baekhyun gasps, “this apartment is great, apologize to it.”

They’re not quite whispering, more like yelling in hushed voices. Baekhyun really hopes Chanyeol didn’t leave his room because he’d totally be able to hear them.

“Don’t change the subject. How long have you liked him?”

“I don’t like him; you know I don’t like people. I’m really fucking attracted to him though.”

“How long?” Minseok urges. “You literally hated him like two weeks ago.”

“I think I realized I wanted him inside of me, _I don’t like him_ , at some point while he had me over his shoulder? I don’t know?”

“Dude he’s literally in your bed right now, just go slip in and grab his dick.”

“No! I can’t.”

Minseok is silent and it scares Baekhyun. Silent Minseok means he’s thinking, and that’s never good for Baekhyun.

“You do like him,” he points a finger and pokes it into Baekhyun’s chest. “You like him, Byun Baekhyun, don’t even try to lie to yourself. If you didn’t you’d have no problem marching in there with your dick out.”

Baekhyun deflates and lets out a long sigh. He sits on the edge of Minseok’s bed and pouts. “Let me sleep in here tonight? Please?”

“Baek—“

Baekhyun’s chin trembles, “I’m scared, Min. Please?”

Minseok’s tough exterior crumbles and he sits beside Baekhyun, pulls him into a hug. “Okay,” he speaks into Baekhyun’s hair, “you can sleep in here.”

 

 

He wakes up in the morning to an empty bed and a guilty conscience. He told Chanyeol he’d be right back before he left his room last night, but never left Minseok’s room after he almost broke down. He feels terrible and he hopes that Chanyeol isn’t mad.

He lies still in bed for a while, wrapped up in Minseok’s soft blanket, and has to talk himself into getting up. He leaves the room slowly, the blanket still draped over his shoulders. Minseok is in the kitchen cooking breakfast, so he makes his way over and sits at the table, waiting for Minseok to notice he’d entered the room.

“He went home about twenty minutes ago,” Minseok says, still facing the stove. “Just thought you’d like to know.”

Baekhyun doesn’t know if he’s upset or relieved. “Oh,” he says, resting his chin on his hand, trying to sound indifferent.

“He asked me where you went last night. Told him you just fell asleep in my room talking to me,” Minseok continues. He turns; there’s a spatula in his hand and he’s wearing the pink frilly apron Baekhyun got him as a joke gift for Christmas last year. “Pretty sure he was totally expecting to get laid.” He sucks his teeth and shakes his head, “Way to be a disappointment, Byun.”

“I hate you,” Baekhyun pouts. “Why am I like this?”

Minseok brings his plate to the table with him, smacks at Baekhyun’s hand when he reaches for his bacon. “Because you’re broken and scared of other people’s affection. You think everyone is going to do what… _he_ did.”

“That’s not—“ Baekhyun leans back and sighs, he can’t even argue because he knows Minseok is right, as much as he wishes he wasn’t. “I know,” he says instead, eyes downcast, “I know.”

“Baek, you know not every guy is an asshole, right?” Minseok lets him take a piece of bacon now, scoots the plate a little closer to him.

“I know,” Baekhyun mumbles through a mouthful of food. He smiles, “You’re not an asshole. Minnie, can’t I just date you?”

Minseok throws his head back and laughs loud, wiping away tears that aren’t even there. “Oh. Oh, god no. Fuck, that would be a disaster.” Baekhyun’s pout has intensified and Minseok almost wants to feel bad for him. He puts a serious look on his face and sits up in his seat. “Baek, look—“

“No!” Baekhyun whines, kicking his feet under the table like a child, “Please don’t ‘ _Baek look_ ’ me, you know I hate that.”

“Look, I went through my phase of crushing on you and I ended up in the friend zone like every other guy that’s interested in you.” He watches Baekhyun’s jaw drop at this new information and gives a small smile; he’d never told Baekhyun about his crush on him before. “What you did with me is the same thing you do to everyone else. Flirt, charm your way into their pants, make them fall for you—“

“I don’t!” Baekhyun argues, “I don’t try to make guys fall f—“

“But they do, Baek,” Minseok interrupts, “they do.” 

Baekhyun scrunches up his entire face into the ugliest pout he can manage. “But why? I don’t want that. I just want to have sex freely but the guy always has to catch feelings and it’s so gross.”

Minseok doesn’t speak. He raises an eyebrow and just gives Baekhyun a look, but Baekhyun knows what that look means; that Minseok knows Baekhyun is lying to himself.

“Relationships scare me. I don’t…” he pauses and, for a minute Minseok thinks he looks like he’s going to be sick, but instead Baekhyun whimpers with the force he’s exerting to hold tears in. “I don’t wanna be hurt again, Min.”

Minseok waits until he’s finished with his last few bites of food to respond. He leans back as he chews; it’s makes Baekhyun nervous. “Okay, be mad at me if you want, but I gotta say it.” He stands, places his dishes in the sink and turns, leaning against the counter. “You are going to be miserable your entire life.”

“Hey!”

“Baek, I love you, but you’re an idiot.” He moves to sit on the table and runs fingers through Baekhyun’s hair. “You can’t just push your feelings down and expect them to go away. Just like with what happened in the past, you gotta deal with it, not ignore it.”

“It’s worked fine so far.”

Minseok’s eyebrow raises, “Has it?”

“No,” Baekhyun mutters.

“I think Chanyeol really likes you. I have to go to work. Think about what I said.”

 

 

 

“I know mom, I miss you too. Tell dad I said I love him for me.” He hangs up and sets his phone on his chest, heaving a heavy sigh. He has to close his eyes and clench his jaw. It’s like this every time he speaks with his mom, the pain is the same with every phone call. But, it’s never enough to convince him to go home. He rolls onto his side and curls up, trying to think of anything to take his mind off of his reason for leaving home.

Baekhyun does think about everything Minseok said to him, for the next few days it’s almost the only thing running through his mind. It’s a lot of hurt and pain he has to sort through from his past, and it sucks, but Minseok is right. Ignoring his problems won’t make them go away.

It takes a while for him to finally admit it to himself, making it to Starbucks, waiting in line, getting his coffee, and finally, he finally admits he maybe, probably, definitely likes Chanyeol. It’s weird and terrifying, but he does. He absolutely (maybe) likes Chanyeol.

This admission makes him think further and he realizes something else; he pulls his phone out and calls Minseok.

“Oh my god,” he says instead of hello when Minseok answers. “I think I liked Sehun, too.”

“Yeah, no shit,” is Minseok’s response.

“Min. I think… _I’m_ the asshole.”

“Yeah,” Minseok says, as if it was obvious. “You are. You lead Sehun on for a long fucking time even after you knew he liked you.”

“I’m awful.”

“Glad you finally realized that. Apologize to him, he deserves that much from you.”

Baekhyun grumbles at the idea of talking to Sehun, let alone having to sit him down and say he’s sorry for being a dick to him. But, once again, Minseok is right; he owes Sehun a sincere apology.

He’ll worry about that later though. Right now, he has to get through work and most likely seeing Chanyeol after running out on him last night. He shivers; Jongin is going to make fun of him so hard.

 

 

“Okay, so I might have a small, teeny tiny, little confession.” Baekhyun grins at the eyebrow Jongin raises.

“Wait let me guess,” Jongin interrupts, “You’ve got the hots for jackpot boy?”

Baekhyun sputters, throwing in a small glare at his coworker. “His name is Chanyeol, you know this.” Baekhyun huffs, aggravated at Jongin for always being right about everything (Just like Minseok, Baekhyun thinks bitterly). “Okay, so maybe I do.” He turns his back to Jongin to hide his embarrassment and begins straightening the prize shelf.

There’s a long pause from Jongin and then he chuckles. “I fuckin’ knew it! I knew it, oh my god! I knew you wanted that tall, lanky weirdo!”

Baekhyun turns, with a much more furious glare this time, and stomps his foot. “Quit it! He’s not weird,” he whines. Jongin raises his eyebrow again. “Okay, so he’s weird...but so are you!” He points and waves his finger in Jongin’s face, “You literally clap when you shit so no one will hear you, don’t go around calling other people weird you…you shit clapper!”

“Uhhhh...”

“Chanyeol!” Baekhyun nearly screams, whipping around so fast his knee cracks. “What are you doing here? Probably here to play some games, win some tickets, do your thing!” He lets out an ungodly screech that’s supposed to be a laugh and looks around for somewhere to hide. He so wasn’t expecting to see Chanyeol this early in the day; he needed more time to prepare himself to face him. God, he hopes Chanyeol doesn’t mention the fact that he’d stayed over at his apartment last night; he can only take so much teasing from Jongin.

“You Okay?” Chanyeol asks, taking a cautious step forward.

“Super busy! Can’t talk. Lots of work. Have fun! Tickets!” He continues muttering meaningless things as he ties his apron around his waist and walks away in search of something to do.

Baekhyun doesn’t run into Chanyeol for another hour. Then, he rounds a corner and slams right into him, spilling tokens on the floor all around their feet.

“Sorry. I’m sorry!” Baekhyun drops down and starts cleaning up, shoving handfuls of tokens back into Chanyeol’s cup. “I’m so clumsy.” He’s panicking and he knows it; having feelings is a lot harder than he expected it to be.

“It’s fine,” Chanyeol laughs, “You’re good.”

The smile Baekhyun sees when he looks up takes his breath away and his brain unhelpfully supplies him with the image of Chanyeol standing in his room in nothing but underwear. He can feel it in his throat that he’s dangerously close to screeching again.

He doesn’t know how long he stares up at Chanyeol, but he knows it’s been much to long when Chanyeol clears his throat and throws another sweet smile his way.

“There you go,” Baekhyun says, breathless for some reason. He tosses the last few tokens in the cup and rushes off in the direction he came from, not even looking back to see the confused look Chanyeol is giving the back of his head.

“Smooth, Baek,” Jongin says, cackling from behind the counter. He’s divvying out candy to a couple rowdy kids, but nothing is distracting enough to keep him from making fun of Baekhyun. “Why don’t you just tell him you like him? Save yourself some embarrassment.”

Baekhyun clenches his fists and tightens his jaw. He wishes Jongin wasn’t surrounded by children because he has a few words he’d like to say. He settles for a middle finger in the air, and then stalks off to sulk in the break room.

He only makes it half way before he’s stopped with a tap on the shoulder. “Hey...Kyungsoo?” He looks around, expecting Chanyeol to be nearby. “What’s up?”

“By now I assume Jongin has told you.” He’s speaking quickly, staring straight down. “I’d just really appreciate it if you wouldn’t tell anybody? I’m not...you know...” he looks up now and blinks twice, “out, yet.”

Baekhyun’s mouth is open and he’s blinking stupidly, his brain racing to piece together any sense in what Kyungsoo is telling him. He lets out a long, raspy, “Uhhhhh?”

“Oh,” Kyungsoo says, eyes widening as he backs away, “He didn’t even tell you, oh my god, forget I said anything.”

Like an explosion, Baekhyun’s brain lights up and he gasps loudly. He jumps forward and stops Kyungsoo, curling his fingers around his shirt and pulling him back. “It was you!” He’s excited, but he stays quiet. “On the phone that day when I was getting coffee, it was you I heard in the background with Jongin!”

“Please don’t tell anyone.” Kyungsoo is looking everywhere but into Baekhyun’s eyes; he’s nervous, embarrassed, scared. Baekhyun didn’t think it was possible for his eyes to get larger than they already were. “Please?”

Baekhyun smiles and it’s bright and warm, and it comforts Kyungsoo just a little. “Not my business to tell, I won’t say anything.” He lets go of the shirt in his hand and Kyungsoo walks off with a soft thank you.

 


	3. Chapter 3

It’s been a week and Minseok’s words have had a life changing effect on him.

When Baekhyun’s mother calls him and asks him to come home for the weekend he takes a deep, terrified breath, and agrees to go. He reluctantly packs his bags that Friday afternoon and has them all waiting by the door for him to take to the car when Minseok gets home from work. He paces around the apartment, anxiety turning into impatience when Minseok texts to let Baekhyun know he’ll be a little late getting home. He just wants to go and get this visit over with.

  
  


 

Baekhyun’s hometown isn’t small by any means, but it’s not as populated as the college town he rushed off to after high school graduation. He hasn’t been back in over three years and nothing has changed, but no surprise there. The little ice cream shop he worked in, and got fired from, is still on the corner of the main road just before the turn for his house. He thinks back to the reason he was fired and has to giggle to himself; he was such a shit back in high school.

The park is his favorite memory of home; many summers and weekends, days skipping school were spent there with his friends. He’s been drunk in that park more times than he can really remember.

“How’s it feel being back?” Minseok asks from the driver’s seat.

Baekhyun hums, still looking out his own window. “Feels…weird.”

“Nervous? That you’ll run into him?”

Baekhyun can see his house nearing and he has to take a deep breath. “Very.”

He really meant to come home sooner than this. He’s wanted to visit his parents but it’s easy to get caught up in college life and forget to make the trip home; especially when he still had fresh wounds he was trying to heal.

It’s been three years now, more than enough time to get over himself, suck it up and visit, even if his mom will more than likely lecture him about staying away for so long. He’ll have to thank Minseok for this; he would have never realized he was running away from his problems without him. Still, it does nothing to help his nerves. But, he’s excited. He misses his parents, he misses his old room, he misses home.

 

 

The first thing he’s greeted with when he opens his front door is a crushing hug from his mother. She’s in tears, probably in disbelief that he actually showed up, and she’s breaking his ribs.

“Hi mom,” he wheezes; Minseok awkwardly shuffles around them, giving them space for their little reunion.

“Your father is at work right now; he’ll be so happy to see you when he gets home!” She turns now, to Minseok, and gives him a bright smile, pulls him in for a hug too. “Is this your boyfriend Baekie? Oh,” she pulls Minseok back, inspecting him and wiping a wrinkle from his shirt, “He’s so handsome, sweetie.”

Baekhyun lets out an awkward laugh, moving to pull Minseok from his mother’s grip. “No, mom, just my roommate.”

“Oh, I bet you two have…you know,” she wiggles her eyebrows.

“Okay! So, my room is back here,” Baekhyun says frantically, grabbing Minseok’s shoulders and pushing him down the hall. “Jesus Christ,” he whispers into Minseok’s ear.

Baekhyun throws himself face first onto his childhood bed and whines. “Tell me why I came here again?”

Minseok laughs loud and sits beside Baekhyun, patting his butt softly. “Because you miss your mom, who is…shockingly open about your sex life.” Baekhyun groans. “Is your dad like that too? Because like, I don’t know if I’ll be able to look him in the eyes if he starts talking about anal or something to me.”

Baekhyun sits up, looks Minseok straight in the eyes, and very seriously says, “Minseok, I will literally kill myself if that happens.”

Luckily, Baekhyun’s father is a quiet man. He doesn’t say much when he sees Baekhyun, but he does pull him into a hug and tells him he’s missed him. He does give Minseok a mildly threatening look, but thankfully doesn’t ask him any questions about whether he and Baekhyun have had sex or not. He’s a terrible liar and that’s a conversation he’d rather not have.

They eat dinner together. Baekhyun’s mom behaves, not asking any more inappropriate questions, though she does keep cooing any time Minseok and Baekhyun so much as look at each other.

 

 

“You need to remind your mom that we’re not dating, dude,” Minseok says when they retreat to Baekhyun’s room for the night. “She keeps giving me these ‘ _I hope you marry my son_ ’ eyes and it’s kinda freaking me out.”

Baekhyun laughs as he strips off his shirt. “I’ll tell her tomorrow, don’t worry.” He pulls his pants down and steps out of them, kicking them aside as he grabs his shorts from his bag. “I warn you though, she’s going to be devastated, she really likes you.”

Baekhyun’s shorts are halfway to his knees, Minseok has his shirt off and is working at the button on his jeans when the door opens. Baekhyun’s mom peeks her head in and smiles. “Oh, you boys. I don’t mind if you do it in the house, just keep it quiet, your father works in the morning.” Baekhyun and Minseok make the same disturbed face as they stare at each other. “Anyway, I meant to ask you what you want me to make for breakfast in the morning?”

“Oh my god mom, literally make anything,” he motions to half-naked Minseok, “We’re trying to get dressed.” He sighs. “Oh, also,” he says, his mom stopping before the door closes completely, “Minseok isn’t my boyfriend mom, like for real, we’re just roommates and we don’t have sex with each other.” _Anymore_ , he thinks.

His mom pouts at them and it freaks Minseok out how much she looks like Baekhyun when she does that. “Sweetie, he’s so handsome though.”

“Mom,” he pinches the bridge of his nose, “please get out.”

“Baekie, I’m just looking out for you. You haven’t dated anyone since Yixing and you’re such a good boy, you deserve to be with someone.”

Baekhyun lets out a soft, shaky breath. Minseok’s eyes widen at the mention of Yixing’s name, this is so not going to go well.

“Mom, please. Please just get out.”

“Baek—“

“Mom!” Baekhyun raises his voice, “I don’t want to talk about this, and I sure as fuck don’t want to talk about him.”

Minseok waits until Baekhyun’s mother shuts the door to say anything. “She doesn’t know, does she?”

Baekhyun swallows thickly, shakes his head. “No. He broke my heart and I ran off to college literally the next day to get away from here.” He sighs and sits at the edge of the bed. “She has no idea what he did to me.”

They decide to just go to bed. Baekhyun cuddles up to Minseok under the blankets and pouts until he falls asleep.

 

 

When Baekhyun wakes up, he almost forgets about how he’d yelled at his mom. He doesn’t want to get up; he doesn’t want to have to deal with her. He hopes she’s not upset with him. He hasn’t seen her in years and doesn’t want this visit ruined because he can’t control his emotions.

He creeps around the house; it’s early and he doesn’t want to wake his mom if she’s still sleeping. He’d much rather deal with her later than sooner. Minseok enters the kitchen as he’s making coffee; he must smell it in his sleep because he tends to always show up to the scent of coffee.

“So,” Minseok starts, “avoiding the topic of last night, what do you want to do today?”

Baekhyun pours them each a mug of coffee and they sit together at the table. He’s not sure what he wants to do today; he doesn’t want to do anything really, except maybe go back to his apartment. But, they decide to go out for lunch so Baekhyun can show Minseok around.

They manage to get out of the house before noon and, per Minseok’s request, stop at a coffee shop that he said looked ‘ _too cozy to pass up_ ’. Baekhyun is driving this time, he could easily just pass the place and keep going, but he doesn’t want to have to explain himself to Minseok.

It’s been a long time since he’s been in here. The chime of the bell as the door opens brings back a lot of memories, some good, some bad, some unbearable. He spent many days here with friends drinking hot chocolate, because they all thought coffee was poison back then. He sat at a table at the back when his mother called him to inform him of his favorite aunt’s sudden death.

He takes in a deep breath.

_He met Yixing here the summer before freshmen year. He was blonde then, tall and cute, a little dimple in one cheek. They bumped into each other, both not paying attention to where they were walking. Yixing wouldn’t stop apologizing and insisted on buying Baekhyun a new drink. Baekhyun was instantly infatuated with him; Yixing was funny and sweet and, he’d find out about a week later, a great kisser._

They order their drinks and Baekhyun tries to shake off the sick feeling he has. Baekhyun follows Minseok to a table and they sit.

“You’re quiet.”

Baekhyun chuckles nervously, “It’s just…lots of memories here.”

“Good ones?”

“Of course not.” Minseok doesn’t speak, so Baekhyun assumes he’s waiting for an explanation. “I met um…Yixing here. We used to come here for most of our dates.”

“Ah,” Minseok says, “I want to apologize for bringing you here, but the coffee is so damn good I can’t even be sorry.”

Baekhyun gives Minseok a crooked smile, “It’s okay. If I’m ever gonna get over things I gotta face them, right?” Minseok nods.

_His relationship with Yixing was wonderful and fierce, and everything Baekhyun had ever wanted. They were perfect for each other, didn’t care about the stares from people in public; Yixing taught Baekhyun to embrace his sexuality and be proud of who he was. He was there for Baekhyun when he finally decided to come out to his parents, something that would have been much more terrifying without someone by his side. Yixing was his everything, his entire world._

“Oh my god Baek, there’s totally a picture of you on the wall over there!”

Baekhyun grimaces; he knows the picture Minseok is talking about. “Yeah,” he says, turning to look at it behind him, “it’s me and my friends from high school. We used to come here so much the owner demanded a picture of us all before we left for college.”

“That’s adorable.”

_Growing up, all Baekhyun ever wanted was to be a doctor. He wanted to help people and make them better. He worked hard through school, graduated top of his class, and got a scholarship to his dream school. He cried when he opened the letter of acceptance and immediately ran to the coffee shop, where all his friends were waiting for him, to tell them the exciting news. The owner brought them all free drinks, in honor of Baekhyun’s amazing achievement, and snapped a picture of them to hang on the wall. That was the last day he ever spent with all of them. The day Yixing shattered his heart and changed his life._

“That was a bad day,” Baekhyun says, bravely deciding to open up to Minseok. “I found out I got a scholarship to my dream school. Me and my friends all celebrated here; that was fun.”

“How is that a bad day?”

“After I left here, I went to Yixing’s to tell him.”

_The anger took Baekhyun completely by surprise; Yixing was supposed to be happy for him, be proud of him. He wasn’t supposed to give Baekhyun an ultimatum. It wasn’t supposed to be Yixing or his dream. He wanted both; he wanted Yixing to support him._

“He told me it was him or school,” Baekhyun recalls sadly, fiddling with the handle of his mug. “He said if I went off to school he would break up with me because how could he possibly know if I was ‘ _running around campus cheating on him or not_ ’.”

“That’s like, way fucked up, Baek. Holy shit, I’m sorry.”

“I just couldn’t believe it, you know? We’d been together for four years. I loved him more than anything and he refused to trust me.”

“So what happened?”

Baekhyun shrugs. “I gave up.” His chin trembles and he looks up, trying to keep the tears from falling. “On him and on myself, obviously. I’m barely passing half of my classes so…yeah.” He gives Minseok a weak smile. “Looking back now I know what I did was stupid. I didn’t take the scholarship, went to a different school to be farther away from him. He ruined my life,” he scoffs, “ _I_ ruined my life.”

Minseok doesn’t know what to say other than he’s sorry and that Baekhyun didn’t ruin his life.

“But I did. All for some _fucking boy_ ,” he snaps. “I should be preparing to go to medical school right now. I shouldn’t be so afraid of having feelings.” Tears pool in his eyes and fall when he blinks. “I shouldn’t be so fucking broken.”

“Baek.” Minseok reaches across the table to lace his fingers with Baekhyun’s.

“God, my parents must be so disappointed in me.” He lets out a bitter laugh. “I’m disappointed in me.”

“Can I say something?” Minseok asks, trying to tread lightly. He waits for Baekhyun to nod. “I know you feel like shit right now, but you needed to do this.” Baekhyun raises his eyebrows. “No really! Cry, fucking scream and throw shit if you want. Get your anger at him out.” He smiles, “I bet you’ve never actually let yourself do that.”

“You’re right, but I think I’ll stick with talking, and crying like a baby.”

“Let’s get out of here.”

 

 

Baekhyun and Minseok spend much of the early afternoon walking around, laughing and joking, and Baekhyun telling stories of stupid things he’s done in places they pass. He explains the time he was almost arrested for getting a little too comfortable with Yixing in the movie theater, and the other time he was actually picked up by the cops for being extremely drunk in the corner store and knocking over an entire rack of candy; his parents weren’t too happy with him that night.

He had a lot of fun growing up here, and sometimes, like right now, he genuinely misses it. He misses the old lady on the corner that sells flowers, and the twins that lived next door to him who introduced him to alcohol when he was 14. He almost, kind of, sort of…misses Yixing. Sure, things with him ended terribly, with lots of tears and anger and the inevitable bottling up of emotions, but they had a really great four years together that Baekhyun will never forget. He grew up with Yixing; all four years of high school, every late night Baekhyun spent, was spent with Yixing.

He sits on the curb as he and Minseok eat the ice cream they’d purchased and sighs contentedly, finally able to sift through his memories. It’s a weird feeling, smiling as his mind focuses on Yixing; it’s something he never thought he’d be able to do. Who would have known that all he needed to begin to heal was to think about all the things that upset him?

“You okay?” Minseok asks around the spoon in his mouth. “You’re scary quiet right now.”

“Yeah,” Baekhyun nods, “I’m actually great. Like, really great.”

“Good. So, what do you wanna do now?”

Baekhyun shrugs, “I don’t know, you wanna go get more coffee and then head back?”

 

 

They return to the coffee shop they visited earlier that day, Minseok insisted. They sit in the same seats with the same drinks, and just chat about nothing in particular. Baekhyun hears someone call his name and he perks up, knowing the voice.

“Luhan!”

The boy sits in the empty chair at the table and holds his mug with both hands. “What are you doing here?” he asks, then gives a small acknowledging smile to Minseok.

“Just came home for the weekend to visit my parents. You know, it’s been long enough.”

“What are you doing here?” Minseok asks. He knows Luhan from all the time he’s spent at the arcade with Baekhyun, and he’s always thought he was cute, young and dumb, but cute.

“I’m from here,” Luhan smiles at Minseok, “Me and Baek go way back.”

“You guys have fucked, haven’t you?” Minseok asks, grinning at the kick Baekhyun gives to his shin under the table.

“We haven’t, actually,” Baekhyun sneers. “I don’t fuck everyone I know, Min, damn.”

“We made out once,” Luhan adds, a wide smile on his face, “At a party, remember?” Baekhyun is trying to shut him up with a wave of his hand, but Luhan only continues. “My freshmen year? You said I was pretty and then you—“

“Shut up, will you? God.”

Minseok and Luhan laugh and Baekhyun glares as he sips his coffee. Luhan decides to spare him more embarrassment and starts talking about things from their past, things they used to do growing up in this town. They talk about a lot of stuff Minseok has never heard, things he didn’t know Baekhyun used to do. How Baekhyun was on the baseball team in high school, or how he broke his spine falling out of a tree when he was a kid.

And then, Minseok’s eyes widen, Luhan brings up Yixing. Baekhyun never knew what became of him after he left, he disappeared and never looked back, blocked Yixing’s number and never spoke to him again.

“He stayed here. Went to the community college and got a graphic design degree.” Luhan is younger than Baekhyun, he stayed for a few years after Baekhyun went off to college. “He asked me about you a lot, you know.”

Baekhyun chews on his lip. “Really?”

“Mh-hm,” Luhan hums as he swallows a drink. “He tried to call you a bunch but said you must have blocked him or something. I think he regretted what he did.” Luhan shrugs and then changes topic, turning to Minseok to ask him some soccer related question.

Baekhyun doesn’t hear anything the other two are saying. He’s frozen in place, heart pounding; Yixing tried to call him? He regretted what he did? Baekhyun’s heart clenches at the thought; his stomach turns.

“Why have you never told me that?” Baekhyun asks, cutting into Luhan and Minseok’s conversation. “You knew the whole time he was trying to reach out to me and you never told me?”

Luhan gapes at him, “I don’t know? You said you never wanted anything to do with him again; I just didn’t think it was important to tell you.” He shrugs.

Baekhyun is numb for the rest of the night. Through the rest of his coffee, on the drive back to his house, as he gets changed and ready for bed, he’s numb, thoughts only on Yixing and the fact that he wanted to talk to him after he left their hometown. He falls asleep thinking about what could have been.

 

 

“This weekend went by so fast,” Baekhyun says, looking at Minseok in the mirror. Minseok isn’t paying attention to him, he’s too busy finger fucking his hair. Baekhyun waits for a response and rolls his eyes when he doesn’t get one. “You know, I really wanna fuck you right now, right up against the counter.”

“What the hell, Baek?”

“Oh, now you’re listening to me.” He makes a fist and holds it up, trying to look intimidating. “You look hot, now stop messing with your hair, we have to get going.”

“Eager to get back to your little boyfriend?” Minseok teases, elbowing Baekhyun in the ribs.

“Chanyeol is so not my boyfriend, cut it out.”

“You wish he was,” Minseok continues his teasing. “Ugh, when you guys finally do the dirty it’s gonna be so annoying. You’re so loud in bed.”

“Stop,” Baekhyun whines as they exit the bathroom together. They grab their bags and make their way to the kitchen, ready to say goodbye and get on the road. Baekhyun’s father is at work, but his mother is standing in front of the sink washing dishes. She turns when she hears the boys enter the room and smiles, turning the water off and drying her hands on a towel before stepping closer to them.

“You boys leaving already?”

“Yeah mom,” Baekhyun says, helplessly accepting the tight hug his mother wraps him in. She holds on for much too long, until Baekhyun’s lungs are screaming for air. “We gotta get back; I have a big project I have to get some work done on.”

His mother leans back and grabs Baekhyun’s face, smooths his sideburns down with her fingertips. She sighs, with that loving look in her eyes only a mother could give her child. “I love you sweetie, please don’t stay gone so long this time.”

This time it’s Baekhyun who moves forward to wrap his mother in a tight hug, tears in his eyes; he buries his face in her neck and sniffles. “I’m sorry mom.” A soft whine slips out and he can’t hold back any longer. “I’m so sorry. I shouldn’t have left like I did.” He gasps a few breaths in and chokes on another sob. “I shouldn’t have stayed away for so long and I shouldn’t have yelled at you yesterday. I’m sorry.”

“Oh, sweetie,” his mother comforts him, a gentle hand running through his hair. She pats his cheek a few times and smiles through the tears she’s fighting. “You were hurt baby, your father and I understood. We just didn’t think it would take you so long to come back to us.”

Baekhyun straightens up and clears his throat. “You…you knew about that?”

“Of course I knew. You really thought Yixing wouldn’t come talk to me when you disappeared over night?” She smiles at an uncomfortable looking Minseok over Baekhyun’s shoulder and pats her son’s arm. “He felt so bad, honey. He really did. I’m not excusing what he did to you, but I can tell you that he felt terrible after you left.” She gives Baekhyun one final hug, then crosses the kitchen to hug Minseok, too. “Now get going, you have a project to work on.”

 

 

It’s silent in the car; Minseok doesn’t even feel like he should turn the radio on, he doesn’t even want to look at Baekhyun beside him, still quietly sniffling. They stop at a gas station nearby Baekhyun’s house and Baekhyun follows Minseok in as he pays for gas and grabs drinks for the drive back to campus.

“You have to be actually fucking kidding me,” Baekhyun whispers, stopping so quickly Minseok slams into his back.

“What are you doing?”

The face Baekhyun makes looks like he’s in pain; he turns to Minseok and lets out a raspy, unhappy groan. “He’s here,” he whispers, shoving Minseok in front of him as they walk back to the car. “Yixing is fucking here, getting gas. Right beside our car.”

“My car,” Minseok corrects stubbornly as Baekhyun continues to push him forward. “Maybe it’s fate,” he shrugs, “Go say hi.”

“Are you out of your mind?” Baekhyun whisper-screams, eyes wide. “And say what? Hey remember when you broke up with me and I ran away, yeah cool, nice to see you again.”

“Or,” Minseok says, prying Baekhyun’s fingers from his shirt, “you could literally just say hi.”

“I would rather die and you know it.”

“Baek?”

Baekhyun freezes in place. He knows that it’s Yixing’s voice calling his name, but he can’t bring himself to actually face him. Instead, he’s staring at Minseok who is staring back at him; they’re inches apart, looking a lot like a couple that’s arguing.

“Baek, is that you?”

The voice is closer now; Baekhyun can hear Yixing’s footsteps approaching him and Minseok. He has to gulp down the lump in his throat, and suppress his urge to vomit. He takes a deep breath and decides to just get this over with; how bad can talking to the person that broke his heart really be?

“Hi,” Baekhyun says, spinning to face Yixing. His voice comes out near screaming volume and he winces at himself. “Hey,” he says quieter this time, stepping back to put more distance between himself and Yixing.

“Hi,” Yixing says; he’s staring at Baekhyun like he can’t believe he’s really standing in front of him.

It’s silent and awkward, and Baekhyun is slowly dying inside with every second that passes with them just staring at each other. He knew this was going to happen; he knew that he’d end up running into Yixing somehow, and that it would be terrible. He hopes Minseok steps in and says something, he’s usually pretty good at diffusing tension.

“I have to shit,” is what comes out of Minseok’s mouth; he points a thumb over his shoulder at the gas station and quickly turns to march back inside. Baekhyun wants to punch him; he’ll definitely punch him when they’re alone in the car again.

“That’s…Minseok,” Baekhyun’s eyes look everywhere but at Yixing, “my roommate.”

“He’s charming,” Yixing laughs.

That laugh, Baekhyun melts all over again; it’s been so long since he’s heard that laugh. He finally looks up and Yixing is smiling, dimple on display. He wants to say something but nothing will come out. Oh god, this is his worst nightmare, he’s going to die in a gas station parking lot because of emotional trauma and a dimple. He briefly wonders how fast a heart can beat before it explodes; he’s not sure, but he thinks he might be close to that limit.

His hand instinctively raises, like he’s going to go in for a handshake, but he forces it down and shoves it into his pocket. No touching, definitely no touching Yixing. That thought is short-lived though, because Yixing, affectionate as always, goes in for a hug. He squeezes Baekhyun tight, Baekhyun’s arms pressed firmly to his own sides. He grimaces, so awkward.

“It’s so good to see you!” Yixing is smiling when he pulls away from the embrace. “It’s been so long.” A short pause, Baekhyun is trembling at this point. “You look good.”

“I…thank you. You uh, you too.” He can feel the heat in his cheeks, spreading through his entire body; he’s miserable right now. “So I heard you’re a graphic designer now?” A safe topic, he thinks.

“I’ve missed you,” is Yixing’s response. The color drains from Baekhyun’s face. “Sorry,” Yixing says, quickly noticing Baekhyun’s discomfort, “it’s just been a long time, and I really have missed you. You kinda disappeared on me.”

Baekhyun wraps an arm around himself and looks down. “Yeah well, you kinda broke my fucking heart, so…” This time he looks up, his confidence returned. “Guess we’re even,” he smiles.

“Hey, ready to go?” Minseok appears beside them so suddenly Baekhyun jumps and Minseok chuckles. “I’ll be in the car,” he says, realizing he’s unwanted in this conversation.

 

 

“Well,” Baekhyun says through a heavy sigh, sliding into the passenger seat beside Minseok, “that wasn’t as bad as I thought it would be.”

“No?”

“No.” Baekhyun buckles in and looks to where Yixing’s car is pulling out onto the street. “We exchanged numbers.” He shrugs, “Don’t know if I’ll ever actually text him or anything, but it’s nice to know we can be civil.”

“Baek,” Minseok says, that warning tone of Minseok’s appearing. “Don’t hurt Chanyeol.”

Baekhyun sputters, half laughing. “What are you talking about? Hurt him how?” Minseok isn’t looking at him, busy paying attention to the road. “Wha-you think…you honestly think I’m going to get back with Yixing?”

Minseok gives a pointed side-eye.

“Please, I’m stupid but I’m not dumb.” He laughs, brushing off Minseok’s ridiculousness. “I would never.” Minseok raises an eyebrow. “I wouldn’t!”

 

 

Baekhyun giggles, rolls completely over into a little blanket burrito, and giggles again, squinting up at his phone in the dark of his room. His teeth dig into his bottom lip as his shoulders shake; he’s trying to keep quiet. He told Minseok he was going to sleep over an hour ago, and he knows Minseok is still up, sitting on the couch in the living simultaneously doing homework and watching Hulu.

He’s been texting Yixing for the past few days. A terrible idea, he knows, but he’s never been one for self-control. To be fair, Baekhyun decided, if Minseok were to find out, Yixing messaged him first. And, he couldn’t be rude, especially not when Yixing’s text ended with a cute little smiley.

He giggles again, hides his face in his blanket shyly as if Yixing can actually see him. They’ve been reminiscing for the past hour, bringing up funny stories from high school. The next message he receives makes him pause with his thumbs over his screen; he chews at his bottom lip.

_From Yixing:_  
_remember our first kiss?_

_To Yixing:_  
_lol yeah y?_

_From Yixing:_  
_idk just thinking about it i guess.. ur a good kisser_

_To Yixing:_  
_so I’ve been told ;p_

_From Yixing:_  
_lots of conquests after me, huh?_

_To Yixing:_  
_......maybe_

_To Yixing:_  
_anyway im tired gotta get some sleep for class tomorrow. night!_

He plugs his phone in and sets it on his nightstand, wanting to stop the conversation before it enters dangerous territory. He rubs his hands over his face and sighs. His screen lights up and he leans over to look at it.

_From Chanyeol:_  
_hey! wanna meet tomorrow before class and get coffee?_

_From Chanyeol:_  
_purely professional of course, I wanted to run an idea for our project by you :)_

_From Yixing:_  
_night Baekie <3_

Baekhyun flops back onto his pillow, deciding to ignore the texts until the morning.

 

 

It’s cold and windy, and looks like it’s going to rain. But still, Baekhyun is walking toward the coffee shop, shivering at the wind hitting him through his thin hoodie. He’s tired, his sleep was restless last night, and he’s just glad Chanyeol wanted to meet at the coffee shop, because he can seriously use the caffeine right now.

Chanyeol is at the counter when he walks in. Baekhyun smiles when the barista hands Chanyeol two drinks, and his smile widens at the stupid face Chanyeol makes at him when he turns and finally notices Baekhyun.

“You look like you really hate mornings,” Chanyeol says as he sits across from Baekhyun. He slides one of the coffees across the table and chuckles as Baekhyun snatches it up and starts gulping it down. “Thirsty?”

“No,” Baekhyun sets his cup down and smacks his lips, “tired. I’m so tired, oh my god. If you wouldn’t have suggested coffee I don’t think I would have come out.”

Chanyeol smiles, “Good decision on my part then I guess.”

“Very.”

They chat a bit. Chanyeol runs back to the counter to buy Baekhyun another drink and they eventually get to talking about their project. Yixing texts Baekhyun good morning, making him smile, and he makes up an excuse for why he was smiling at his phone when Chanyeol asks.

It’s raining when they exit the shop together, both heading to school. Their psychology class isn’t until tomorrow, so they part ways once they reach campus, but not before Chanyeol surprises Baekhyun with a hug. It warms Baekhyun from head to toe, scrambling his brain momentarily.

“Bye Baek.”

“Uh, bye.” Baekhyun smiles once Chanyeol’s back is turned. He watches Chanyeol walk a few steps before finally turning to start his own walk to class.

 

 

Texting Yixing proves to be a rather taxing feat. His ex is still the same flirtatious boy that he knew in high school, and he finds himself blushing ninety percent of the time. He knows it’s a dangerous road he’s letting himself travel, but it’s kind of hard to resist. Yixing has always been irresistibly charming.

Sunday marks a week since he’d first started texting Yixing. He’s at Chanyeol’s house working on their project that they’ll have finished by the time he leaves in a few hours. They’ve taken a break, now sitting in the living room waiting for the food they ordered to arrive.

Baekhyun doesn’t know how to feel about the project coming to an end. Of course he’s happy it will be over because he hates psychology with a burning passion, but he can’t help but wonder how much time he’ll spend with Chanyeol once he no longer has a reason to hang out. He’s amazed with himself, how much he’s grown to really enjoy Chanyeol in the short time they’ve been hanging out. He’s kind of stupid and really loud, very clumsy, but he’s also really tall and hot, and really sweet. He’s ridiculously thoughtful too, always bringing him coffee when he comes over because he knows Baekhyun has a slight caffeine addiction.

He watches Chanyeol’s back as he talks to the delivery guy at the door. His legs look great in the dark jeans he’s wearing. He lets out a dreamy sigh and quickly rearranges his face to an indifferent expression when Chanyeol turns around. His phone vibrates.

_From Yixing:_  
_hey baekie what are you up to?_

_To Yixing:_  
_im with my friend working on a project for psych_

_From Yixing:_  
_a cute friend?_

Baekhyun watches Chanyeol fight with his noodles, dropping them from his chopsticks back into the bowl; the broth splashes onto his shirt. Baekhyun chuckles and makes a sarcastic remark that makes Chanyeol pout.

_To Yixing:_  
_very cute_

_From Yixing:_  
_cuter than me?_

Baekhyun pulls his feet up onto the couch and chews the inside of his cheek to hide his smile.

_To Yixing:_  
_maybe.. y u jealous?_

_From Yixing:_  
_very_

Baekhyun stares at his phone. That was not the answer he was expecting. He thought he’d get something sarcastic, something witty. Something other than ‘very’. What does that even mean? What does he even say back to that?

_To Yixing:_  
_…really?_

_From Yixing:_  
_of course, I wanna be the cutest boy you give your time to_

Baekhyun blows out a breath through pursed lips and tosses his phone onto the coffee table. He chooses to start eating instead of replying. Chanyeol yelps suddenly and Baekhyun has to laugh; he’s spilled more broth on himself, some dribbling down his chin.

“You’re a mess,” Baekhyun says. He places his bowl on the table and gets up on his knees, leaning over to wipe the broth from Chanyeol’s chin. “Like a child.” He makes it halfway back to his seat before Chanyeol grabs his wrist. “What?”

It only takes a small tug to have Baekhyun falling forward. He’s on his knees over Chanyeol, one hand on the couch cushion beside Chanyeol’s hip, and the other still in Chanyeol’s hand. There’s a small curl at the corner of Chanyeol’s mouth and his eyes look hopeful, narrowed slightly as if to ask if this is okay. Baekhyun’s heart is pounding, his mouth open as he blinks up at Chanyeol. He’s sure he’s never experienced a silence quite like this before. He can feel himself moving forward, can see the room disappearing as his eyes slip closed; his head tilts when he feels Chanyeol’s breath on his lips.

And then…

A loud commotion from somewhere else in the house startles them and Baekhyun jumps back, landing on his butt at the other end of the couch. Sehun enters the room with a few people Baekhyun doesn’t recognize and makes a face.

Baekhyun knows he looks like someone caught doing something they shouldn’t have been doing. He’s gulping down deep breaths, holding his hand over his heart; Chanyeol has returned to eating his food, bowl in his lap that he’s staring down at.

Baekhyun picks up his phone, aiming to pretend to be busy on it to avoid conversation.

_From Yixing:_  
_i miss you, lets hang out soon_

“You staying and drinking with us?” Sehun asks, giving Baekhyun the same hopeful eyes Chanyeol had just given him.

Baekhyun looks at Sehun then back to his phone, he glances at Chanyeol, then Sehun, and back to his phone once more. His heartbeat picks up and his breath shallows; he feels backed into a corner. He panics. “No! I have to get home,” he nearly shouts at Sehun, standing and hurrying to collect all his things from the table to shove in his backpack.

“Oh.”

“You do?”

Chanyeol and Sehun speak in unison. Baekhyun answers with a hum and a nod, and flings his backpack over his shoulder. “I-I’ll see you in class tomorrow Yeol.” He says bye and pushes past Sehun, slipping his shoes on and rushing out the front door.

He texts Minseok as he walks, asking him to meet him at a bar not far from where he is. He could use a beer or five right now, and also a good talk about what he’s doing with his life with his best friend. Minseok agrees to meet him and Baekhyun picks up the pace; getting drunk has never sounded so good.


	4. Chapter 4

“I told you, did I not?” Minseok’s nostrils are flared, a telltale sign that he’s annoyed with Baekhyun and his poor life decisions. “I fucking _told_ you that talking to Yixing was a bad idea.” He drinks from his beer and sets it on the table. “But why would you listen to me? Why would you ever listen to me? Why do I keep giving you advice knowing you never take it?”

Baekhyun is pouting, holding the lip of his beer bottle to his mouth. They’ve been at the bar for well over two hours now and Baekhyun only wishes he had half the alcohol tolerance that Minseok has. They’ve drank the same amount, six beers each, and Baekhyun is just short of sloppy, while Minseok could probably still drive them home if he needed. He sighs and takes another drink.

“I know, Min, I know! Okay?” He makes an ungodly noise and slams his forehead on the table. “Can’t you just tell me what to do instead of yelling at me?” He attempts to give Minseok his cute face, the one with the big eyes that used to work to get Minseok naked.

“Don’t make that face at me.” Baekhyun’s cuteness intensifies. “God, why the hell did I ever let that stupid face affect me?” He sighs when Baekhyun doesn’t give up. “If I give you advice will you actually listen this time?” Baekhyun perks up and nods; Minseok leans over the table and smacks Baekhyun’s forehead. “Stop talking to Yixing and just please, for the love of god, let yourself like Chanyeol.”

All Baekhyun does is whine and hug his beer to his chest. He jumps when his phone vibrates on the table.

_From Chanyeol:_   
_hey, hope you made it home okay :) i kno u had to walk and its cold and shitty out. sehuns making me walk to the store to get more beer D:_

“If that’s Yixing I’m going to actually shove your phone up your ass.”

“It’s Chanyeol,” Baekhyun says, smiling at his phone, “and who’s to say I won’t like it if you do?” He laughs at Minseok’s dramatic eye roll. “Vibration,” he says, wiggling his brows at Minseok.

_To Chanyeol:_   
_be sfafe! dnont talk to starangers :p_

_From Chanyeol:_   
_lol u drunk? without me?? im hurt, truly hurt :’(_

Just then a waitress comes around with a tray of shots. The bar is closing soon, so they’re getting rid of them for free. Minseok tries to say no, but she won’t let him, giving him and Baekhyun each three. They gulp them down, of course, because you can’t waste free alcohol.

Baekhyun forgets to reply to Chanyeol. He forgets he was even texting Chanyeol.

Tequila hits Baekhyun like a freight train. Always has, always will. Tonight is no different. Maybe he wouldn’t have downed the shots if he’d known what they were.

 

 

He’s just on the other side of sloppy now as he leans on Minseok, using his shoulder to keep him from sliding to the concrete. Minseok is, in all honesty, the only thing keeping Baekhyun from hitting the pavement, and he’s not too sure if he appreciates the responsibility. It’s extremely difficult, getting Baekhyun to walk even a slightly straight line; they almost fall more than once, but Baekhyun only continues to giggle and cling to Minseok.

“Minnie!” Baekhyun giggles once again and drags Minseok down as he holds onto him for dear life. Minseok is his life saver right now; he wouldn’t be on his feet if it weren’t for him. “Minnie, you’re m-hero. M-strong and sexy hero.”

Minseok flusters, mostly at the slim hand sliding down his front, dangerously close to his dick; he’s used to Baekhyun flattering him with words. He shakes his head and hoists Baekhyun up further to get a better grip on him.

Suddenly, Baekhyun stops walking. He turns to Minseok with a terrifyingly serious expression. “You know what’s so so weird?” He waits patiently for Minseok’s hum of acknowledgement before continuing with a sharp gasp. “All our teeth fall out and then just…they just come back!” He chuckles and rests his head comfortably on Minseok’s shoulder, urging them forward again. “They’re literally I’m you but stronger.”

Minseok stops them again and turns his head to look at Baekhyun, who’s now resting his eyes with a wide smile on his face. “What the f— how drunk are you? Honestly.”

“Chanyeol!” Baekhyun screams, so suddenly Minseok jumps and almost drops him. “Tall Chanyeollie!”

Minseok watches in confusion as Baekhyun untangles himself from around his shoulders and starts stumbling forward toward the street. He snatches Baekhyun up by the wrist at the last second, pulling him back from a car speeding by, and grips him up from under his arms.

“What are you doing? You almost got hit by that car!”

“But…but Chanyeol!” He points a finger across the street, flailing his arm to further prove a point that Minseok just isn’t getting. “He’s right there!” Without warning Baekhyun jumps and waves his arms, knocking Minseok back and freeing him from his grip. “Chanyeol!” he screams.

Minseok looks up and, for the first time, notices a guy across the street walking with his hands in his pockets, earbuds shoved into his ears. He hates himself for it, but he sighs and takes Baekhyun’s hand; he’ll just walk him across the street like a child.

Baekhyun, if he remembers, will hate himself for this in the morning.

Once safely across the street he tears away from Minseok and launches himself directly into an oblivious Chanyeol. They don’t fall; Chanyeol manages to keep his balance and hold up, from what he can tell, is an extremely trashed Baekhyun.

“I’m sorry,” Minseok says, out of breath as he steps over to them. “He’s an actual child when he’s had too much to drink.”

Baekhyun is busy rubbing his face on Chanyeol’s puffy coat; the material is coarse and slightly wet from the earlier rain, but it feels like heaven to Baekhyun.

“It’s okay,” Chanyeol just chuckles. He has to wrap his arms around Baekhyun to stop him from sliding onto the ground. It’s like trying to hold a baby that refuses to stay still. He looks down at Baekhyun, looking absolutely content with his face pressed against his chest. “How did you get so drunk between when you were texting me and now?”

Baekhyun only makes soft noise, so Minseok answers for him. “Tequila.”

Chanyeol tightens his grip once again as Baekhyun starts to fall back; he laughs. “He’s way fucked up, you should probably get him home.” He starts to push Baekhyun toward Minseok, but Baekhyun clings onto him.

“Take me home, Yeollie!” Baekhyun slurs cutely. “Take me home with you!” He looks up, his chin pressing into Chanyeol’s chest, one eye open slightly more than the other. “Chanyeooool’s bed tonight!” he sings, rearranging himself on the other side of Chanyeol so that Minseok can’t reach him from where he’s standing.

Minseok sighs. “Baek, I really don’t think Chanyeol wants to deal with you.”

“I don’t mind,” Chanyeol says, and Baekhyun sticks his tongue out. “Besides, he’s kinda got a death grip on me; I don’t think we could pry him off.”

Minseok’s eyes narrow, “Are you sure?”

Baekhyun starts rubbing his face on Chanyeol like a cat. “I’m sure. Really, I don’t mind. I’m in a frat, I’m confident in my ability to care of the inebriated.”

Minseok looks from Baekhyun to Chanyeol a few times, nervously chewing his lip. If anything were to happen to Baekhyun he’d never forgive himself, but Chanyeol has this charming confidence about him that’s hard to not trust. He nods, “Okay. Alright, just…text me when you get him safely to your place. Please?”

 

 

 

_To Minseok:_   
_made it back. he’s stripping his clothes off in the living room.. have a good night minseok!_

_From Minseok:_   
_jesus christ please don’t let him hurt himself. and you too_

_From Minseok:_   
_also baek flails in his sleep when he’s drunk so keep a safe distance_

Chanyeol reads the messages but doesn’t get a chance to reply; he has to quickly cross the room and stop Baekhyun from pulling his pants off. Baekhyun giggles, jumps to avoid Chanyeol and continues slithering out of his jeans. Chanyeol chases him around the couch, catches him just as his jeans reach his knees and he loses his balance. Baekhyun hits the floor and Chanyeol stares down at him, slightly out of breath, and extremely amused.

Baekhyun pouts and raises both arms, making grabby hands at Chanyeol. He’s helped up, wobbling as he gets to his feet. Chanyeol shakes his head as he takes Baekhyun by the shoulders to push him toward his room, waddling because his jeans are still around his knees.

Baekhyun falls onto Chanyeol’s bed, flat on his back, like a starfish taking up the entire mattress. He hums, content, as Chanyeol pulls his shoes off for him, then slides his jeans the rest of the way off. If he wasn’t so absolutely wasted, he’d be really into the idea of Chanyeol undressing him, but right now all he can think about is how soft the sweats Chanyeol is carefully pulling up his legs feel. The noise that leaves his mouth is dangerously similar to a moan and Chanyeol pauses to look up at Baekhyun, gulping down the arousal trying to surface. He shakes his head and sighs, _focus Chanyeol_.

“Where ya’ going?” Baekhyun asks when Chanyeol turns his back to him.

“Just…to the bathroom really quick.”

Baekhyun shimmies in place a bit and whines, pushes hit bottom lip out into a cute little pout. “Promise you’ll cuddle me when you come back?”

“Uh,” Chanyeol wants to say words, he really does, but he can’t think of any. When the hell did he become such an idiot around cute guys? “Uh…sure.” He hurries to the bathroom without looking back.

With the bathroom door behind him shut and locked he gives himself the time he needs to properly freak out. Baekhyun is just outside the door, in his bed, waiting for him to come cuddle him. This is okay. He looks at his reflection and tries to give himself a reassuring smile; this is fine. He can do this.

He brushes his teeth, washes his face, gives himself a little pep talk, and then exits the bathroom. He’s totally not shaking with nerves.

All his hopes of cuddling Baekhyun to sleep are crushed before he can even fully shut his bathroom door. He can’t tell by just looking, but the soft snoring coming from the still sprawled out Baekhyun tells Chanyeol he’s already fast asleep. He’s relieved, a little sad as well, but mostly relieved. Minseok wasn’t joking; drunk Baekhyun is a challenge.

Chanyeol trips over Baekhyun’s pants balled up on the floor and stops to pick them up. He begins folding them, and Baekhyun’s phone slips out of a back pocket, landing on the floor at Chanyeol’s feet. He picks it up, wanting to set it on the nightstand beside Baekhyun, but the screen lights up, showing a couple texts from someone Chanyeol doesn’t know.

_From Yixing:_   
_ive been thinking about your lips tonight_

_From Yixing:_   
_lets hang out soon Baekie_

The messages knock the breath out of Chanyeol, and he stares at them for longer than he should. He locks the phone and sets it beside Baekhyun, his shaky hands letting it clumsily fall onto the table. Baekhyun stirs but doesn’t wake enough to do anything but groan and mumble a drunken, jumbled version of Chanyeol’s name. At the sound of his name, Chanyeol smiles sadly. He grabs a pillow and one of the extra blankets on the bed and silently exits the room, closing the door behind him.

 

 

Baekhyun wakes up with a groan, cracking his back as he stretches. He reaches out, expecting a hand to land on Chanyeol, but all he feels is cool sheets beside him. He knows he doesn’t fully remember everything from the previous night, but he definitely remembers falling asleep waiting for Chanyeol to crawl into bed with him. He frowns and sits up, turns and plants his feet on the floor. He only has a moderate hangover; it’s manageable.

He finds his own pants and changes, folds Chanyeol’s sweats and leaves them neatly on the bed. He pockets his phone and checks the bathroom before leaving, just to be sure Chanyeol isn’t in there. It’s empty, so he heads out into the hallway. It’s oddly silent in the frat house, though it is a weekday, so many of the guys are probably in classes right now. He tiptoes all the way down, to where the hallway becomes the living room, and is surprised to see Sehun sitting on the couch holding a bowl up to his mouth.

“Hey, do you happen to know where Chanyeol is?” He pauses, bites his tongue; he really doesn’t want to give Sehun this next bit of information, but he does anyway. “I woke up and he…wasn’t in the bed, so…”

Sehun moves the bowl and shrugs. “He left not too long ago. Not sure where he went though…he seemed kinda mad?”

Baekhyun frowns and sits beside Sehun. “Mad? Why?” He peeks over into Sehun’s bowl and licks his lips, ramen, yum. His stomach growls and Sehun chuckles.

“Hungry?”

“Very.”

 

 

Baekhyun stands beside Sehun, leaning against the cabinets in the kitchen as the younger stands over the stove, stirring the noodles in the pot.

“So, not that it’s any of my business, but what happened last night? You guys were loud as hell when you came in.”

Baekhyun makes a face and groans. “I was kinda really drunk.” He sighs. “I left a bar and saw Chanyeol walking down the street and my drunk ass made him bring me here.”

Sehun turns the stove off, strains some of the water, and pours the noodles into a bowl that he sets on the table for Baekhyun. They sit across from each other and Baekhyun begins eating.

“You know,” Baekhyun starts, mouth full of food, “I’ve been meaning to apologize to you. Things with us were uh, kinda bad and…you know, I never meant to lead you on like I did.” He drinks some broth and clears his throat. “I’ve been doing a lot of thinking recently and I realized I was an asshole to you and so…yeah, I’m just really sorry.”

Sehun is looking down, but Baekhyun can see there’s a small smile on his lips. “Thank you,” Sehun mutters. He looks up and his smile widens.

“I really like Chanyeol,” Baekhyun says confidently; it feels great to say it. “A lot.” He knows it’s probably not what Sehun wants to hear, but Baekhyun just needs to get it out, someone needs to hear it.

“I know you do.”

“You do?” Baekhyun questions, “How?”

“You look at him the same way you used to look at me,” Sehun says, a little sad, but with that same small smile on his lips.

“I…I’m sorry, Sehun. I really am.” He pushes the empty bowl further away from him and sits forward. “I had a lot of issues then and I—“

“It’s okay Baek. You don’t have to explain yourself to me.” He grabs the bowl and takes it to the sink, then turns and crosses his arms. He gives Baekhyun a playful smirk. “I’m over you now anyway. I’m on to bigger and better things.”

Baekhyun’s lips purse and he stands, narrows his eyes at Sehun. “Someone better than me?”

They laugh together and chat a bit more as Sehun walks Baekhyun to the door. He asks Sehun to tell Chanyeol to text him whenever he gets home, and leaves after they share a quick hug.

He feels good. He feels really good. Great even. He walks with a pep in his step and a smile on his face. It’s nice out today and the sun is shining, and he feels like absolutely nothing could possibly go wrong. He likes someone. He likes Chanyeol. He apologized to Sehun, gotten through the pain of his past heartbreak, and just all around feels like he’s floating. His phone vibrates.

_From Minseok:_   
_hey dipshit u alive? or did Chanyeol kill u?_

_To Minseok:_   
_thanks for ur sarcastic concern, yes im alive. woke up only a little hungover, apologized to sehun, cant find yeol… but I feel great_

_To Minseok:_   
_I like him so much and im gonna tell him today. im gonna finally tell someone I like them holy shit min!!_

_From Minseok:_   
_proud of u. my baby is growing up :’)_

Before he answers Minseok’s text, he notices messages from Yixing from last night. The first one makes him roll his eyes and laugh; Yixing is ridiculous.

_To Yixing:_   
_it’s a bit last minute, but im not busy tonight if u wanna drive out here and hang at my place?_

_From Yixing:_   
_I’ll be there babe_

He sends Yixing his address, lets Minseok know he’ll be coming over (he’s not happy about it), and then enters the sandwich shop he’d been stopped in front of; he's thirsty and he's been told they have amazing smoothies. There’s an unusually long line, but he’s so happy today he can’t even let that bother him.

It’s about ten people in front of him so he busies himself with his phone, head down as he reads through random articles on his Facebook feed. The line moves forward and the next person orders, catching Baekhyun’s attention with their all too familiar deep voice; he looks up, smiling from ear to ear.

“Chanyeol!” he calls out excitedly, waving a hand up in the air to get his attention. Chanyeol looks back, his eyes widen, and he turns back to the counter. Baekhyun puts his arm down and frowns. He watches the back of Chanyeol’s head as he pays and then steps to the side to wait for his order. He gets antsy waiting for the line to move and steps out, deciding to skip the smoothie and go talk to Chanyeol instead.

“Hey,” he says, bumping his hip against Chanyeol’s. “You ran out on me to get food?”

Chanyeol smiles, but it’s not a usual Chanyeol smile. “You were sleeping,” he shrugs, “figured you wouldn’t mind if I was gone when you woke up.”

Baekhyun scoffs, rolls his eyes. “I recall falling asleep waiting for cuddles.” He looks up, gives Chanyeol the cutest pouty face he can manage, “I woke up all alone.” He laughs now and pinches Chanyeol’s side, trying to get any kind of reaction out of him, but Chanyeol doesn’t even look at him. Sensing the awkward air around them, Baekhyun sidesteps, putting a small distance between them. He clears his throat as the cashier hands Chanyeol a small paper bag, and then follows as Chanyeol makes his way to the door and out onto the busy sidewalk.

“Hey,” Baekhyun says, taking a handful of Chanyeol’s shirtsleeve to stop him from walking away. There’s a lump in his throat he can’t explain and he can’t bring himself to look up into Chanyeol’s eyes. “Did…are you okay?” He does meet Chanyeol’s eyes now and the expression he sees hurts. “Did I do something wrong last night?”

Chanyeol’s face falls and he lets out a small huff; he pulls his arm from Baekhyun’s grasp. “I just…I thought you liked _me_.”

Baekhyun’s stomach drops and he reaches out for Chanyeol, but he shrugs away from the touch and starts walking away. Baekhyun is frozen in place, stuck watching Chanyeol’s back, unable to call out for him to stop. He’s confused, _so confused_ , and his chest is tight. He doesn’t know what just happened; he wants to know what happened last night that changed everything.

He watches until Chanyeol disappears into the crowd of people. He’s stunned silent, hurt. He can’t, for the life of him, understand what Chanyeol meant; of course he liked him. He still likes him.

This feels familiar to him. The tightness in his chest, the lump in his throat. The tears building in his eyes remind him of Yixing, of being broken up with. But, he wasn’t broken up with; he wasn’t with Chanyeol to begin with. So, why does watching Chanyeol walk away like that hurt this much? He takes his phone from his pocket and dials Minseok.

 

 

Minseok finds him on a bench in the park, an empty coffee cup in his hands and tears lining his eyes. He’d answered Baekhyun’s call and nearly ran out of their shared apartment when he heard the tremble in Baekhyun’s voice. He sits beside him and doesn’t speak; Baekhyun leans his head on Minseok’s shoulder. Minseok knows he has to break the comfortable silence soon, as much as he doesn’t want to; he needs to know exactly what happened.

“I don’t know what happened, Minnie.” He sniffles and uses Minseok’s shoulder to wipe a tear at the corner of his eye. “I went to sleep and woke up and now he hates me. I…I don’t know what I did.” Minseok slips an arm around him and pulls him closer. “What did I do?” he asks, mostly to himself.

Baekhyun walks Minseok through what he can remember of the night, after he’d left him and went off with Chanyeol. He explains how Chanyeol was sweet and took care of him, didn’t try to take advantage of him. He tells Minseok that Chanyeol tucked him into bed and he fell asleep waiting for him to come out of the bathroom, and when he woke up, Chanyeol wasn’t there.

“Letting go was all for nothing,” Baekhyun says, his chin trembling. He’s angry at himself. “I finally put myself out there, let myself like someone…” His face crumbles and finally, he lets his tears fall. “I just don’t know what I did wrong,” he cries, “I just wanted to like someone again.”

Minseok buys Baekhyun another coffee and then takes him home. He has to go to an afternoon class, but he sets Baekhyun up on the couch with the coziest blanket they have before leaving.

Baekhyun is good at pushing feelings down. He’s had plenty of practice over the past few years, but something is different this time. He replays last night over in his head hundreds of times, this morning in the sandwich shop. He just can’t see what he did to change how Chanyeol feels about him.

Finally, he sits up with an aggravated sigh; he runs his hands over his face. This just won’t do. Byun Baekhyun doesn’t mope. And, he definitely doesn’t like people. Not even Chanyeol, he tells himself. With a finalizing nod, he stands and goes to his room to get dressed. Yixing should be here soon.

 

 

“You look sad,” is the first thing Yixing says when Baekhyun opens the door.

Baekhyun’s smile falters for only a second and quickly returns. He tells Yixing he’d been watching a sad movie and changes the subject as he leads him further into the apartment. He takes Yixing’s jacket for him and throws it on a chair, and turns back to him. He doesn’t know what to say. Hanging out with Yixing is weird; he hasn’t done it in so long.

“So, what do you wanna do?” Baekhyun asks.

“Well,” Yixing says, holding up a bag Baekhyun hadn’t noticed earlier. He smiles, “I thought we could have a few beers and just catch up?” Baekhyun returns the smile and agrees.

A few beers turn into the six pack Yixing had brought, plus the other eight that Baekhyun had left over in his fridge. They’re lazing on the couch in the living room, the TV is on quietly as background noise, and Baekhyun is just drunk enough to not notice Yixing scooting closer to him.

Through all the laughter and reminiscing, Baekhyun sends Chanyeol a few texts.

_To Chanyeol:_   
_hey_

_To Chanyeol:_   
_yeollie what are u doing??_

_To Chanyeol:_   
_guess ur still mad since u wont reply to me_

_To Chanyeol:_   
_i wish u would tell me what i did_

He sighs and tosses his phone onto the table, grabbing his beer beside it and chugging down the rest. He sits back and crosses his arms, pouts to himself because the alcohol is so not working to take his mind off being sad. A hand lands on his shoulder and he jumps; he’d almost forgotten Yixing was here with him.

“You okay?”

“Fine.” Baekhyun shrugs; Yixing starts to massage the shoulder he’s holding and Baekhyun melts into it, letting his eyes slip closed. This is something Baekhyun forgot he missed about dating Yixing: magical hands, magical massages. He begins to turn himself, moving so Yixing can reach the other shoulder, giving him a proper massage. Baekhyun hums, arches his back when Yixing digs his thumbs in, slides his palms across his shoulder blades.

Yixing’s hands go lower; Baekhyun gasps, it feels amazing. He knows the beer is a large contributing factor in this, the main reason he’s not pulling away. It feels so good he’s forgotten about being sad; he’s forgotten about Chanyeol. Yixing’s hands lower still, and this time, his fingers play at the edge of Baekhyun’s shirt, slip under the fabric to press into the smooth skin of Baekhyun’s lower back. Baekhyun feels the cushion behind him dip and then there’s a hot breath against his ear.

“I’ve missed you, Baekie,” Yixing whispers, his fingers now working small circles into Baekhyun’s bare skin.

“I…I’ve missed you too.” Baekhyun’s skin is on fire and he can’t blame it entirely on the beer. Yixing is nearly pressing his chest against Baekhyun’s back now, his exhales constantly fanning across Baekhyun’s ear; it has shivers running down Baekhyun’s spine. “Yixing,” Baekhyun whispers, wanting to tell him to stop, but he cuts himself off with a yelp.

Yixing raises Baekhyun’s shirt and presses his lips to the center of his back; his hands coming around to feel up Baekhyun’s soft tummy. Baekhyun’s head drops back and he raises up onto his knees; Yixing backs away as Baekhyun turns to face him. Baekhyun is out of breath, his cheeks red, lips parted; Yixing knows that look and what it means, has seen it many times in their years together as boyfriends.

It’s Yixing who moves first, lunges forward at Baekhyun and pins him against the arm of the couch on his back. Yixing’s lips feel exactly as Baekhyun remembers them; the hands sliding up the front of his shirt brings back memories of them as horny teenagers itching to touch each other’s bodies. He moans into Yixing’s mouth, bucks his hips when a finger slides over his nipple. Yixing kisses Baekhyun’s jaw, down to his neck; his hand pulls out of his shirt and moves to the button of Baekhyun’s jeans.

“Please!” Baekhyun cries impatiently. He grabs Yixing’s shoulders and pushes him down, urging him to take his pants off of him.

And, Yixing doesn’t disappoint. He wastes no time in sliding back, undoing Baekhyun’s jeans and tugging them down. Baekhyun watches this, holding his breath as his jeans slide down his thighs. Yixing is carelessly tugging, in a rush to get Baekhyun naked; nothing like the careful way Chanyeol had taken his pants off for him last night.

“Stop!” Baekhyun shouts suddenly. Yixing looks up with wide eyes, his fingers still curled around the jeans he has pulled down to Baekhyun’s knees. “Stop!” Baekhyun scoots himself back and shimmies his pants back up, buttoning and zipping them. He’s taking deep, trembling breaths as he stares at a confused Yixing. He curls up, hugging his knees to his chest, “You should go. We shouldn’t do this.”

“What?” Yixing scoffs and stands, crosses his arms over his chest; he’s clearly aggravated. “Why?”

Baekhyun stares at his phone on the table. He wants to call Chanyeol. He wants to hear his voice. He wants Chanyeol to be the one sliding the jeans off his legs, the one kissing him breathless. He’s had Yixing, he’s been hurt by Yixing; he doesn’t want that again.

“You’re not what I want,” Baekhyun shakes his head, “not anymore.”

Yixing smooths a hand through his hair and shakes his head. He clicks his tongue, clearly unhappy with Baekhyun’s sudden change of heart. He snatches his jacket off the chair beside him and slips it on, “This is a joke.”

“You’re a joke,” Baekhyun mutters, trying his best not to cry.

Yixing stomps to the door and pulls it open, “You’re the fucking joke, literally who does this?”

The lump in Baekhyun’s throat hurts and he’s trying so hard not to cry in front of Yixing; he just wants him to leave. “Chanyeol would never get me drunk to take advantage of me.”

“Go fuck him then!” Yixing growls and then slams the door behind him, finally leaving Baekhyun alone.

Baekhyun leans back and covers his face with both hands, sobbing loud into his palms. His tears stream down his cheeks as he gasps, trying to regulate his breathing. How could he be so stupid to ever trust Yixing again? He hates himself right now, and still, all he wants is to talk to Chanyeol. He grabs his phone and dials it, wipes at his wet cheeks with his free hand.

He’s still sniffling when it begins to ring, still gasping down short breaths every so often as his crying calms. It rings and rings, and rings some more. Chanyeol doesn’t answer. He doesn’t leave a voicemail; he doesn’t know what to say. I’m sorry. Please answer. I just want to hear your voice because it’ll make me feel better.

_To Chanyeol:_   
_im sorry. i don’t know what I did but im so sorry_

He turns his phone on silent and tosses it on the table, not even bothering to hold his tears back as he lays on his side and closes his eyes.


	5. Chapter 5

When Minseok got home from work he walked in to find Baekhyun lying on his side on the couch, eyes barely open and cheeks splotchy red from crying. He didn’t ask what happened, just picked Baekhyun up and helped him to his bed, tucked him in and turned the light out.

 

 

“Morning,” Baekhyun says softly, entering the kitchen where Minseok is busy cooking breakfast. He sits at the table and stares at the wood; he’s no longer tired but his eyes feel heavy from the previous night of crying.

“Morning,” Minseok says back, leaving his place in front of the stove just long enough to pat the top of Baekhyun’s head. He hates seeing him like this. “I’m making pancakes, if you’re hungry.”

Baekhyun shrugs; he doesn’t know if Minseok sees it, but he doesn’t feel like speaking. He waits silently until Minseok is finished, looking up when he sits across from him. He sighs and pouts.

“I made out with Yixing last night,” he says, eyes now focused back on the table. “And…I just thought about Chanyeol the entire time and I…I couldn’t do it.” He takes a deep breath and looks at Minseok, sitting, listening. “I didn’t want to kiss Yixing. I wanted to kiss Chanyeol.” His chin trembles and chokes back sobs, “But, he won’t even reply to my texts and I don’t know why.”

It takes some convincing, but Minseok gets Baekhyun to eat something. As Baekhyun eats, he gives Minseok the full story of what happened between himself and Yixing the night before. Minseok offers to go kick Yixing’s ass, which gets a laugh out of Baekhyun, but he tells Minseok that isn’t necessary; he tells Minseok he should kick his ass instead for ever agreeing to hang out with Yixing in the first place.

After breakfast Baekhyun plants himself on the couch, ready to laze around and watch TV all day feeling sorry for himself. He grabs his phone every so often, half wanting to message Chanyeol again, half hoping that he’d already have a message from him. Neither ever happens.

He watches an entire season of The Office before he finally gets up, only to go to the bathroom. He’s washing his hands when his phone rings, and he nearly trips over himself running down the hallway to answer it in time.

It’s only Jongin. As much as he doesn’t want to, he answers.

Baekhyun’s not sure how, but he ends up on the phone with Jongin for nearly an hour. It’s probably because Chanyeol is the only thing on his mind, but he’s brought up during their conversation. Baekhyun spills everything to Jongin, finally giving the older the entire picture of where Baekhyun is at in terms of misery right now.

It all sounds so lame, so melodramatic, as Baekhyun recaps everything that’s happened between him and Chanyeol. His life is a true one-sided affection, a sad, miserable, soap opera right now, and just the thought of it makes him want to cry. Since when was he so mushy and sentimental?

“I finally did it. I finally got over stupid Yixing…finally had feelings for someone again…and I don’t know what happened.” Baekhyun sighs for the hundredth time into the phone and rearranges himself on the couch. “He won’t even text me back.”

Jongin isn’t much help; he’s not the friend you go to for relationship or any kind of advice, really. He does listen though, and that’s what Baekhyun really needs right now, just someone to let him vent until he doesn’t feel like talking anymore. Jongin is great at silence.

“Wait, so, who’s Yixing?”

He doesn’t go into full detail, not like he did with Minseok, but he gives Jongin a small history lesson on himself. He explains to him the basics of what Yixing is to him, and what he meant to him in the past. He even tells him about how he’d stopped Yixing from taking his pants off, because he wasn’t Chanyeol. Baekhyun ends it all with a long, heavy sigh.

“He’s just…an asshole really.

“Sounds like it,” Jongin agrees. He’s at work, has been the entire time he’d been on the phone with Baekhyun. “I’m getting yelled at by the boss,” Jongin says suddenly, “I’ll call you or something later, see how you’re doing. Maybe we can go drink or something.”

They say goodbye and Baekhyun is back to his lonely silence; the Netflix screen staring at him, asking if he’s still watching. He rolls his eyes at his sad reflection in the dark screen, of course he’s still watching.

 

 

Hours later, sick of watching reruns of TV shows, Baekhyun decides to be productive in his moping. He cleans, something he picked up from his mother; cleaning is a stress reliever and right now, he’s far beyond stressed.

As he cleans, he thinks. And, as he thinks, he gradually gets less sad and more angry at Chanyeol. He’s being childish. How dare he be so vague and not tell Baekhyun what he did? They aren’t teenagers, Chanyeol should have just told him what was bothering him.

He finishes cleaning thoroughly pissed off. He’s decided that he’s going to storm over to Chanyeol’s stupid frat house, knock on his stupid door, and yell at his stupid, but still disgustingly attractive, face. He’s not going to be a hurt little boy and mope, no, he’s going to go after what he wants. He’s not going to run from his problems. Not this time.

So, he squeezes his ass into his lucky jeans and storms out of his apartment, dead set on getting Chanyeol to talk.

 

 

He doesn’t know why, but he expects Chanyeol to be the one to open the door. So, when his obnoxious knocking stops and someone finally swings the door open, he’s thrown off when he’s met with someone he doesn’t know.

He frowns. “Who are you?” The guy opens his mouth; Baekhyun raises his hand, “Never mind, it doesn’t matter. Is Chanyeol here?” He’s already got his neck stretched out, head peeking into the house over the man’s shoulder; nothing but shirtless frat guys walking around.

“Uh, no I don’t think he’s here.” He watches Baekhyun for a moment, still peeping into the house. He wants to laugh, “So, what did Chanyeol do this time?”

“What?” Baekhyun asks dismissively.

“Usually when cute little dudes like you come knocking for Chanyeol it’s because he did something stupid.” He shrugs. “So, what was it?”

“Sehun!” Baekhyun whisper-shouts, ignoring the guy in front of him. He waves his hand hoping the get Sehun’s attention, but the younger turns the corner. Baekhyun grumbles to himself and pushes past the guy at the door, letting himself in and down the hallway he’d watched Sehun disappear down.

“Hey,” Baekhyun says in place of a greeting, scaring Sehun so thoroughly he jumps and flattens himself against the wall. “Sorry. Have you seen Chanyeol today?”

“Nice to see you too,” Sehun breathes, hand still clutching at his shirt over his heart. “I haven’t seen him,” his eyes narrow at Baekhyun, watching him look around the house, “I know he’s like _super_ pissed at you, though.”

Baekhyun’s head snaps toward Sehun and his eyes narrow now; he moves in closer, pressing Sehun further against the wall. “Oh, he’s pissed? _He’s_ _pissed_? No, I am, Sehun. I’m pissed.”

Sehun raises both arms, signaling that he believes him. Baekhyun decides getting in Sehun’s face and probably scaring him isn’t going to accomplish anything so, without another word, he backs away and stomps off to Chanyeol’s room. He’ll just wait for him to get home.

The door is conveniently open, so he walks right in and makes himself comfortable on the bed; he doesn’t know how long he’ll be sitting here for. He realizes the poor decision he’s made when he remembers how comfortable this bed is, and how much it smells like Chanyeol, and how good Chanyeol smells. He hums contentedly and sighs, twisting and turning in the blanket to get to a perfect level of comfort.

He’s at the edge of a nap when someone sits on the bed beside him. For a moment, he thinks it could be Chanyeol and he argues with himself in his head, suddenly feeling much less brave than when he first stormed through the house looking for Chanyeol. His eyes are closed; he could pretend he’s sleeping.

“Comfy?” Sehun asks.

Baekhyun cracks one eye open. “How did you know I was awake?”

“Please,” Sehun holds in a laugh, “I’ve seen you sleep enough times to know that if your mouth isn’t open to drool everywhere, you’re not actually asleep.”

“Fair point,” Baekhyun glares. He sits up and leans his forehead on Sehun’s shoulder; now that he’s calmed down from his earlier rage he feels like crying again. “Did Chanyeol tell you _why_ he’s mad at me?”

“Shit,” Sehun says, pushing at Baekhyun’s chin to make him look up, “you’re like…actually upset.” Baekhyun doesn’t say anything, just whines and lets his head drop onto Sehun’s shoulder. “What the hell happened?”

“I like him so much, Sehun.” He grips Sehun’s shirt with both hands. “He won’t tell me what I did. I’ve tried calling him and texting him and he just won’t talk to me.”

Sehun wraps his arms around Baekhyun and plants his chin atop his head. “I think…he thinks you have a boyfriend.” He rearranges himself to get a better hold around Baekhyun, and clears his throat. “He said something about it yesterday.”

“What?” Baekhyun asks, thoroughly confused. “Why would he think that?”

Sehun shrugs, “No idea, something about a text you got the night you were drunk.”

“He looked through my phone?” Baekhyun is sitting up now, sadness replaced with anger. “What the fuck?”

“No, he told me he grabbed it off the floor to put it on the table beside you and it lit up and there was a text from, _your boyfriend_. His words, not mine.”

“What the fuck,” Baekhyun repeats. His mouth is open, eyes narrowed as he stares at the wall trying to think of what text Chanyeol could have seen that would make him think he has a boyfriend. “Oh my god,” Baekhyun groans, “fucking, Yixing. He ruins everything I swear.”

That one stupid text. The one that made him roll his eyes that morning after he’d left Chanyeol’s house. Yixing, hitting on him like an idiot. And, Chanyeol saw it, saw Yixing telling him he’d been thinking about his lips. He wants to punch Yixing, and he wants to punch Chanyeol for just assuming and not talking to him.

“You okay?” Sehun asks after minutes of silence.

“Do you know where Chanyeol is?”

“He has class until late tonight. Why? Are you gonna fight him? Because I can assure you he’ll cry, dude can’t take a punch.”

“I might.”

 

 

“Nini!” Baekhyun shouts, reaching over the table on his tip-toes to pull Jongin into a hug. “And,” he leans back, gives a wide smile to the boy at Jongin’s side, “Kyungsoo! It’s so good to see you guys.” He wiggles his eyebrows, “And, together, too!”

Jongin and Kyungsoo slide into the booth with Baekhyun and Sehun; Sehun gives them both a tight smile. “He’s a little drunk, if you couldn’t tell.”

“How do you get drunk at an Applebee’s, Baek?” Jongin cocks an eyebrow, takes notice of the six or so empty margarita glasses surrounding Baekhyun’s space at the table. “When will you learn tequila is the enemy?”

“I told him to stop after the first two,” Sehun says matter-of-factly, “but he kept waving over random waitresses and asking for more.” He shrugs, “Besides, after the third one he finally stopped sulking so I kinda just went with it.”

Jongin opens a menu and moves it over so Kyungsoo can look. “Chicken strips are good,” he mumbles. “So, Baek, drinking away your problems again?”

“NO,” Baekhyun shouts. He shrugs, “A little.” He takes the last sip from his glass and smiles with his mouth full. “You know,” he says, swaying his arm, knocking over an empty glass. He giggles and sets it upright. “You know, I wasn’t planning on getting drunk.”

“Yeah,” Sehun interrupts, “we were supposed to eat and then go back to the house to wait for Chanyeol, but,” he sighs at Baekhyun trying to get another waitress’s attention, “here we are.”

Jongin slaps Baekhyun’s hand out of the air and gets a pointed glare in return. The waitress Baekhyun had been calling over stops beside their table with a smile. “Never mind,” Jongin says, “he wanted another margarita but we’ve decided he’s cut off.”

“Not fair,” Baekhyun whines as the waitress walks away. “I’m so happy right now, I need to keep drinking or I’ll cry.” He gives Jongin a blank stare, “You don’t want me to start crying again, do you?”

“Take him home,” Jongin says as he slides his arm over Kyungsoo’s shoulder. “Get him sobered up before he talks to Chanyeol.”

Sehun nods and stands. He grabs Baekhyun’s wrist and pulls him up, giggling as he stumbles slightly. He helps Baekhyun slip into his jacket and waves at the couple at the table before ushering his drunk friend toward the exit.

 

 

“Sehuuuun! Carry me, I don’t wanna walk anymore.”

Baekhyun is back to sulking. He kept his smile for approximately two blocks past the restaurant and somehow, something he saw reminded him of Chanyeol and his smile turned to a pout.

“I don’t want to carry you,” Sehun grumbles, as he’s leaning down to let Baekhyun crawl up onto his back. He stands, makes sure Baekhyun’s legs are secure around his waist, and continues walking. “You’re lucky you only weigh like 100 pounds.”

“130, thank you very much.” He hugs around Sehun’s neck and rests his chin on Sehun’s shoulder. “You’re a good friend, you know that?”

“Thanks,” Sehun grunts, slightly winded. He hops a bit to try to hike Baekhyun higher up his body. “You know, for someone so light, you’re really damn heavy.” Baekhyun just hums his acknowledgement and squeezes Sehun’s neck a little tighter.

They continue on in silence for a while. Sehun’s back is screaming, aching to set Baekhyun down, but he can hear soft snores just beside his ear and can’t bring himself to wake Baekhyun up and make him walk. So, he sighs and keeps walking.

He honestly feels bad for Baekhyun. He’s known him for long enough to know the kind of person he is: kind of an asshole, but also one of the sweetest people he’s known. Sure, Baekhyun had led him on for a long time, but that doesn’t make him a bad person. Sehun has to agree with Baekhyun, Chanyeol is being a child, and he’s hurting Baekhyun’s extremely delicate feelings.

On the other hand, Sehun knows Chanyeol very well too. He’d never purposely hurt someone, especially someone he likes. If he thinks Baekhyun has a boyfriend, he must assume that Baekhyun wouldn’t care if he stopped talking to him. Sehun frowns. But, Chanyeol can’t really be that stupid can he? Shouldn’t he understand that Baekhyun likes him from all the texts and calls he’s ignored? He rolls his eyes; he thinks Chanyeol must be the worst psychology major ever.

“Sehun?” Baekhyun says softly, smacking his lips. Sehun hums. “You can put me down now.”

Sehun stops and crouches a bit, letting Baekhyun slide off of him. He stands and cracks his back and gives Baekhyun a small smile. “You okay?”

“Yeah,” Baekhyun sighs, “I think…I’m gonna go back to my place.” He runs the tip of his pointer finger down the length of Sehun’s arm and looks up into his eyes, giving him a stoic smile. “Chanyeol doesn’t want to talk to me…I—I’m not gonna make him.”

Sehun nods, squeezes Baekhyun’s hand. He thinks Baekhyun is making the wrong decision, but he won’t be the one to tell him that. “I can talk to him for you, if you want?”

Baekhyun shrugs, shakes his head, smiles, all at once. “Don’t worry about it. Thank you, though. I…if he wants to talk to me he can, but I’m not gonna force him to.”

Sehun thinks Baekhyun is being just as stubborn and stupid as Chanyeol. If they would just sit down and talk, in literally two sentences everything could be cleared up. But, he doesn’t say anything. He’s not their mothers; he can’t force them to do what they both clearly don’t want to do.

“Call me if you need anything,” he says instead, and gives Baekhyun a tight hug.

 

 

Baekhyun walks slow, a casual pace set by the alcohol he’s consumed and his lack of urgency to get home. He’s not drunk anymore, a little tipsy at the most, but he feels a good level of fuzzy happiness bubbling under his skin.

The street he’s walking down has twinkly lights hanging in the trees and he looks up at them as he walks, letting his eyes go out of focus, blurring the lights and the leaves together. He wonders if he could do the same with his feelings for Chanyeol, blur them somewhere between his heart and his brain. He sighs at his own weakness, his inability to face his problems; he sighs because old habits die hard and, once again, he’s walking away.

Somewhere between regret and self-loathing, his phone rings. It’s Minseok, asking him where he is, if he’s eaten today, if he’s feeling better. Baekhyun has to stop and actually think about how to answer that last question. Is he feeling better?

“Physically?” he asks, knowing that that’s not what Minseok meant. “No, I feel…I feel like I just got drunk at a family restaurant to try to dull the emotions I should be feeling right now.” Minseok doesn’t say anything; Baekhyun groans. “I feel angry and sad and…and stupid.” He wishes Minseok could see his pitiful pout, “Will you make me cookies? And watch a movie with me?”

“I’d love to, but I can’t. I have a date tonight.”

Baekhyun scoffs, browses his mental catalogue of every cute guy they know, trying to think of who Minseok could possibly be going out with. “Liar, you hate everyone we know.”

“I don’t hate Luhan,” Minseok is quick to reply. “Time alone might be good for you, you know. You can think and stuff.”

“Must be nice to like someone without it being complicated.”

“I never said I liked him,” Minseok says, “He’s dumb and cute and seems like he’d be fun, that’s all.”

Baekhyun’s eyes roll on instinct, “You wouldn’t blow me off if you didn’t like him. Don’t try to play me, I know how you work.” He gets a wide, crooked smile, “Minseok likes a grubby little freshman, how cute.”

“Go home. Take a bath, cry, masturbate…whatever you gotta do to make yourself feel better.” He pauses while Baekhyun chuckles. “I know your ass chickened out of talking to Chanyeol tonight, but you’re gonna tomorrow.”

“Are you gonna make me?” Baekhyun challenges.

“No, but I know you’ll do the right thing.”

 

 

“The right thing,” Baekhyun mimics an hour later, his voice echoing off the bathroom walls. He lifts his leg, watches the water drip back into the tub, and then places it back in the hot water. He’s up to his chin in bubbles and he’ll have to remember to thank Minseok later because this is incredibly relaxing. “I don’t wanna do the right thing. It’s hard,” he whines.

He texts Minseok after his bath, sending him well wishes and hoping his date goes well; he doesn’t get a response and takes that as a good sign. With nothing else to do, he decides to actually get some homework done. So, he sets himself up at his desk, slips his glasses on, and opens his laptop.

He sees the file on his desktop, the one Chanyeol created for their project, and suddenly, he doesn’t feel like doing homework anymore. He looks at his pile of notebooks and school books, then to his bed; sleeping sounds good, he decides.

 

 

He’s frantically shaken awake by Minseok at 2:34 in the morning. He jolts upright and screams; he’s not sure why, but for some reason screaming seems appropriate. Minseok gives him a confused stare, but doesn’t comment.

“What?” Baekhyun asks through his sleepy haze.

“So…I fucked him.”

This information wakes Baekhyun up fully and he smiles wide. “I knew it! I knew when you didn’t reply to my text that that’s what was going on!” He grabs either side of Minseok’s face and squishes his cheeks. “How was it?”

“Good. Weird?” Minseok’s eyes narrow as he stares off into the distance. He takes a deep breath and lets it out quickly. “He’s definitely a freshman,” he jokes, raising an eyebrow as he smirks. “Very… _eager_.”

Baekhyun throws his head back and laughs, “Jesus Christ, lucky you.”

They chat a little more about Minseok’s sexual endeavors, until Baekhyun’s tired eyes can’t stay open any longer. Minseok reminds Baekhyun they have classes in the morning, and they decide to get to bed.

 

 

Baekhyun is staring straight ahead, directly at the white board behind the professor standing at the front of the room speaking words he doesn’t hear. He’d almost forgotten they had to not only do the project, but also present their findings to the class. At this point, it’s been nearly a week since he’d last spoken to Chanyeol, his texts and calls still done unanswered, and he still hasn’t gotten the courage to go to Chanyeol’s frat house and confront him. He’s nervous, to say the least, to stand beside Chanyeol and have to work with him to give a successful presentation.

He’s done his part, made printouts to give to the class; he can see the poster board Chanyeol was supposed to complete sitting on the floor beside his desk. All that’s left is to actually face Chanyeol. He takes a deep breath; he can totally do this.

They’re called up for their turn and Baekhyun stands on trembling legs, slowly making his way to the front and hoping he doesn’t pass out from nerves. He makes quick eye contact with Chanyeol and hurries to look away.

While Chanyeol gets the poster board set up on the table at the front, Baekhyun passes the handouts to everyone, then takes his place beside Chanyeol.

He’s staring directly at the floor, scared that if he looks up, if he looks at Chanyeol, he’ll cry or yell and ruin their grade. So, he stands there, deciding it would be best for everyone to just let Chanyeol do all the talking. He knows more than Baekhyun anyway.

It goes well. Chanyeol really knows his stuff, delivers the information appropriately and precisely, and then, he turns to Baekhyun.

“Do you want to add anything?”

Baekhyun gawks, dumbfounded, at Chanyeol. How he so easily spoke to him, a pleasant smile on his face. It infuriates Baekhyun for some reason.

“D-do I want to…” He clenches his jaw, tight fists crumpling the paper he’s holding. “Are you kidding me?”

An awkward silence fills the room. If Baekhyun wasn’t glaring so hard at Chanyeol he’d see the confused, shocked faces of everyone sitting in the room. But, he can see Chanyeol’s face and he looks distraught, wide eyes begging Baekhyun not to do this, not now, not here.

But it’s too late; Baekhyun’s anger has finally spilled over and there’s no holding back now. Not even when he’s standing in front of a room full of people.

“Like,” he smiles incredulously, letting out a short laugh, “Are you actually fucking joking right now? Do I want to add anything?” he mocks. His eyes narrow, he’s fully facing Chanyeol now, the class and their grade be damned. “There’s a whole lot of things I’d like to add, you asshole.”

Chanyeol is frozen, giving Baekhyun a blank stare.

“Um, boys?” the professor interjects, “Maybe not here?”

Baekhyun looks at him momentarily, finally realizing what he’s doing in the middle of their presentation. His anger leaves him instantly and he turns back to Chanyeol, face dropping when he sees that he’s walking away from him, toward the door.

He takes one look at the class, the professors concerned face, and decides, fuck it. Chanyeol is more important. Minseok was right, he needs to do the right thing, and he needs to do it now. He lets the paper fall from his hands and runs for the door, calling Chanyeol’s name.

Baekhyun catches him in the hallway, just around the corner.

“Chanyeol, please,” Baekhyun begs, latching onto Chanyeol’s jacket in attempt to keep him close, to keep him from walking away again.

He takes a deep breath and puts a shaky smile on his face. “I don’t have a boyfriend. I haven’t in years. I’ve been too scared to have feelings for anyone, at all, since high school.” He moves his hand from Chanyeol’s sleeve to his forearm and squeezes. “But, fuck, I have feelings for you. So many feelings, and I don’t want to just not say anything and walk away from what we have…or, had…before.”

Baekhyun is holding his breath, eyes hopeful as he watches Chanyeol’s eyes scan his face. The longer the silence goes on, the more Baekhyun feels like crying; he just wants Chanyeol to speak. Instead, he pulls his arm from Baekhyun’s grip, and Baekhyun thinks he can almost hear his heart breaking.

“I’m sorry,” Chanyeol says; he’s looking down at the space between their feet. But, when he looks up, and Baekhyun can see the smile on his lips, he knows there’s hope. “I should have said something. That night. The text on your phone, I…I just thought—“

“I know,” Baekhyun interrupts, “but I promise that he…Yixing doesn’t mean anything to me, not anymore.”

 

 

Baekhyun has his eyes closed. His head is resting against the wall behind him and he’s smiling. He can hear children running and screaming, the token machine spitting tokens out, the machines beeping and dinging, all the sounds mixing together.

“Do you wanna go out drinking tonight after work,” Jongin asks from the seat beside him.

“Can’t.” Baekhyun doesn’t even open his eyes. “I have a date tonight.”

“Byun Baekhyun has a date, huh?” Jongin punches Baekhyun’s shoulder lightly. “That’s something I never thought I’d hear.”

Baekhyun opens his eyes now and grins at Jongin. “It’s something I never thought I’d say.”

Jongin opens his mouth, ready to tease Baekhyun, but is interrupted by a familiar deep voice and an even more familiar set of big, dark eyes.

Both boys behind the counter hurry to stand and hug their respective boyfriends.

“What time do you get off tonight?” Kyungsoo asks, grimacing as Jongin pecks kisses atop his head.

“Oh!” Jongin perks up, “according to that clock, two minutes ago.” He runs around the counter and scoops Kyungsoo up into his arms. “Let’s go get drunk!” He begins pushing his small boyfriend toward the door and waves his arm back at Baekhyun, “Have fun you two!”

Baekhyun walks around the counter now too, stopping arm’s length away from Chanyeol. He takes a minute to just look at him, a content smile on both their faces. “Ready?”

“Lead the way,” Chanyeol says, holding his arm out for Baekhyun to take.

 

 

Baekhyun is pouting. He hasn’t spoken a word to Chanyeol since they left the arcade. He thought playing a few games with him would be fun; he thought they would have a good time. And, they did; Baekhyun had a great time playing around on a few games with Chanyeol. But, his seemingly permanent smile lasted only until Chanyeol walked up to the counter and emptied his bag of all his tickets.

“No,” Baekhyun said, staring at the pile in disbelief. “No, you can’t.” He shook his head, looked between the tickets and Luhan standing behind the counter. “Don’t let him do it, Luhan.”

With the widest, most annoying grin, Chanyeol pushed the tickets closer to Luhan and said, “I’ll take the giant bear!”

So, Baekhyun is bitter.

They finally make it to Baekhyun’s apartment door and he’s still sulking. “I can’t believe you made me watch you get the bear. You’re the worst.”

“What?” Chanyeol argues, “I told you a long time ago that I was saving my tickets for it!” Baekhyun glares and Chanyeol sighs. “Come on,” he whines, wrapping his arms around Baekhyun’s waist and burying his face in his neck, “don’t be mad. It’s just a stuffed bear.”

“Yeah, but it was supposed to be _my_ stuffed bear. You jerk!”

“Big baby,” Chanyeol teases, pulling away to look down and pinch Baekhyun’s cheek. He rearranges the bear over his shoulder and motions for Baekhyun to go into his apartment. He stays in the hallway as Baekhyun turns in the doorway. “See you tomorrow in class?”

“Yeah, yeah. Whatever.” Baekhyun rolls his eyes, but it’s playful; Chanyeol knows he’s not really mad at him. “Goodnight.” Chanyeol says goodnight and Baekhyun shuts the door, ready to go straight to his room and pass out in his bed. He only makes it a few steps from the door before he hears knocking.

He’s laughing when he opens the door and Chanyeol is holding the bear up, hiding behind it.

“What are you doing, you idiot?”

Chanyeol lowers the bear and smiles. He steps forward, bumping the bear into Baekhyun’s chest. “Take it.”

“What? No…Chanyeol, I was just joking,” he chuckles, “you won it, it’s yours.”

There’s a moment of silence between them, and Chanyeol pushes the bear into Baekhyun’s arms, letting go before Baekhyun gets a chance to refuse.

“I won it for you, though.” Baekhyun tilts his head. “I’ve been saving my tickets for months trying to win this bear for the cute guy that works at the arcade.”

Baekhyun’s mouth opens and he lets out a small huff, not knowing what to say. He hugs the bear and presses his cheek into its fur. “How’d you know I wanted it?”

“Sehun told me,” he shrugs. “I originally was saving up for something else but decided on the bear when he told me that’s what you wanted.”

“You’re incredible, you know that?” He lets the bear fall from his arms and kicks it aside so he can step closer to Chanyeol.

“I’ve been told that a few times,” Chanyeol says with a cocky smirk.

And then, Baekhyun is reaching up, stretching on his tip toes, and pressing his lips to Chanyeol’s. The kiss ends quickly and Baekhyun is stepping back into his apartment, staring at Chanyeol; he makes a face at him.

“What?” Chanyeol asks.

“Are you coming in, or what?” Baekhyun raises an eyebrow, implying that coming in will be worth Chanyeol’s time. And, Chanyeol rushes forward, trips over the bear as he swings the door closed and stumbles forward, hand-in-hand with Baekhyun, toward his bedroom.

The giant stuffed bear spends the night on the living room floor beside the door where he was left. But, it’s probably a good thing; his innocent eyes don’t need to witness what’s going to happen after Baekhyun locks his door.

Or, at least he thought he locked it. Because, once again, Minseok walks in on the two in a compromising position, but this time there’s less clothes and Minseok couldn’t possibly misunderstand what’s going on.


End file.
